BF2S Forums So the Mrs just kissed another guy...

kiss some random bird and then ring her to apologise.

She owned up to it immediately. That counts for something. Clearly she knew she was wrong. So do you.

Had the same thing happen to me about 4 years into my marriage. It was with my best friend. She hid it from me because she knew how much it would bother me to have my best friend do something like that (long story, but she was spot on). I was mad...extremely so. I was hurt...extremely so. She told me when she was about 8 months pregnant with our son (it was well afterward, so no inventive math there). What could I do?

I forgave her, but neither her nor I will ever forget what happened.

I didn't forgive my friend. He had been with me through a lot more shit than my wife had and he still chose to do that. Of course, I learned later he was in a very bad place in life and wasn't dealing with it well at all. We eventually reconciled after much emotional bloodletting...and he was killed in an aircraft accident less than a year later.

Moral of the story: Life's too short and too precious to dwell on that kind of shit. Deal with it and move on. She is clearly beside herself and doesn't even know why it happened. Your best bet (if you truly love her) is to work with her to figure out why it happened and fix that. Your relationship will be stronger for it.

Of course, if it went anything beyond a single kiss...all bets are off.

Mek-Stizzle wrote:

Life's too short to dwell on that kind of shit, it's also too short to dwell on a relationship which is like shit.








yeah....

So one thing happens and suddenly the relationship is "like shit"?

You've got some life to live yet, Mek.

ELITE-UK wrote:

[TUF]Catbox wrote:

was she drinking?   Has your relationship been okay lately... ?
any red flags recently... her dressing nicer or losing any weight?
Her kissing someone else can be a blip on the radar or a deal breaker...  I would try and be cool and let her explain... people make mistakes...
If you wen't out and had a few beers and some girl was being flirty and you ended up kissing her..and you felt bad
you would hope your girlfriend would understand... she sounds like she knows she screwed up...
If your relationship is strong... try and work it out... if not...  ?

She and I dont drink, the relationship has been rock solid, apparently it was just a old friend or something. I told her that i wasnt mad at her, but in reality i am mad, but im not at the same time...its killing me

Take this as wisdom:  something is troubling her, something is feeling shaky to her about your relationship, or there is something buried here that is a ticking time bomb.  She crossed a boundary and there IS a reason why that boundary was crossed.

So, get a third party that can help you talk through your relationship (e.g. counselor).

mtb0minime wrote:

ghettoperson wrote:

Just to clarify for the Yanks, by Mrs. he doesn't mean he's married, just his girlfriend. Confusing I know.

It's not even a European vs. American thing, we say that here, too.
I just don't think some members know anything about E-UK, like how old he is, etc.

Oh.. Good grief then...  Screw her then!  No marriage, no kids, E-UK younger guy?  Yes, dump her -don't look back, no phone calls, e-mails, singing telegrams.  In six month she'll call.  Don't answer.  Get on with your life...

DBBrinson1 wrote:

mtb0minime wrote:

ghettoperson wrote:

Just to clarify for the Yanks, by Mrs. he doesn't mean he's married, just his girlfriend. Confusing I know.

It's not even a European vs. American thing, we say that here, too.
I just don't think some members know anything about E-UK, like how old he is, etc.

Oh.. Good grief then...  Screw her then!  No marriage, no kids, E-UK younger guy?  Yes, dump her -don't look back, no phone calls, e-mails, singing telegrams.  In six month she'll call.  Don't answer.  Get on with your life...

We had a long long talk, i think everything is ok

Wife and truly old friend?  She initiated apologizing and on the surface seems sorry.  Work it out.

Girlfriend?  Depends on how long you've been together.  I'd be a bit concerned.

In any case, talk it out.  Communication is a must here.

Last edited by Stingray24 (2008-11-04 16:53:08)

Best course of action here is you go and have sex with some random girl, and then call and apologize.

Hey, maybe she already sucked his ****, so you can never be sure.  Go ahead.

[TUF]Catbox wrote:

let her know how much it hurt you

SEREMAKER wrote:

this the beginning to the end

This is why I don't believe in marriage.

I'd punch her in the uterus.

I know it sounds counter intuitive but in my experience you have to think about yourself and not her in these situations.

You're mad, it's eating at you and it will keep swelling in your chest until it's blown way out of proportion if you don't deal with it now. Tell her everything, you have to let her know that you're really mad and hurt, don't worry about fucking things up (you won't - as long as you don't lose control and flip tables or hit her). She's been there for you before (I hope) so she'll understand completely, even if it does take time.

Women are very complicated, I don't know anyone who understands them but I do know it's helpful for anyone if they have to accept the consequences of their actions, or else they'll never learn from their mistake. So let her know you're mad, but don't over do it.

Then again I've only been married 2 years, so you probably have more insight than me yourself really.

Finally, whatever happens be patient and good luck.