i was a dick though, and like i said - as hard as it may be to understand with my bf2s persona - i'm just not like that in real life. i don't start shit at parties and i don't bring drama into public. it was really out of character and i shocked people-- some people i don't know that well, some people i know, some people my best friends... and obviously her. i really care about her so i can't just be all macho and egotistical about it and blame her. she has already said to me that she's sorry for the awkward situations that her recent past have put me in: our social groups are pretty much overlapping and so i've had to see the guy at parties since we started going out. just... last night... something was different in my head. perhaps the drink affected me in a different way: instead of being reasonable and just ignoring it, i was out for fucking blood. got to apologize at least partly for that; it's uncalled for.
libertarian benefit collector - anti-academic super-intellectual. http://mixlr.com/the-little-phrase/