The BF2s girl-problems thread

2009-04-30 08:11:06

#751

Bevo: Nah; +718|6668|Austin, Texas

Lai wrote:
Tetn1s wrote:
should I be worried if I tell this one girl's best friend that I like the girl? I want to make sure that this girl likes me before I ask her out to avoid emberassment and awkwardness, do you think she will squeal? From how she acts I dont think she would but not sure wat girls way of thinking is. I am worried of this because she might tell the girl I like her and that will pretty much ruin anything with her because it shows that I have no confidence at all. What do you think?
No third party to be honest. Better to face embarassment and awkwardness, than using a bypass. You'll feel way more embarrassed and/or awkward when the friend does/says something stupid or generally the girl finds out before she should.

You probably think, what can go wrong? Well, a lot actually, crazy stuff. You'll want to cut out as many people as possible, people can't be trusted.

Lai has it right.

Besides, if a girl likes you, there's definitely signs. "We should go watch a movie together" or "Lets go xyz" tend to be good indicators that a girl likes you. Some girls flirt uncontrollably, others will be more subtle. You just have to recognize these indicators yourself, and bam, no need for an awkward mess including her friends.

2009-04-29 20:13:17

#752

Hurricane2k9: Pendulous Sweaty Balls; +1,538|5849|College Park, MD

So I met this girl about 2 months ago. She was really awesome, and we got along really well. We hung out a lot during the month of March, and the day school let out for spring break she professed her feelings for me. I had the same feelings for her. I was on vacation but we spent a lot of time each day talking to each other. It seemed like she was head over heels for me, and I kinda felt the same way for her. This was my first shot at having a girlfriend, and I was excited.

We went on a sort of 'date' when I returned and we had a lot of fun and were still getting on real well. Later that week I asked her to prom (in front of like 120 people on stage at school) and she said yes. I told her that was the happiest night of my life thus far. Things seemed great.

Fast forward a couple of weeks. I felt like there was something weird between us. I asked her. She said she really liked me, but she didn't want to get into a relationship because I'm going away to college and she doesn't want to be hurt by falling deeply in love with me only to have to break up a few months down the road. Fair enough.

For some unexplainable reason, she has begun to seemingly ignore me. Half the time she sees me in the halls or just around school she doesn't even wave hi to me (for instance, today I was in the school store and she was chilling with some friends and I know she saw me but she didn't even say hi). She rarely talks to me on Facebook or on the phone. I did absolutely nothing to deserve this; I'd been treating her with the same respect and friendliness that I have been. I talked to her about it last week and all she said was "sorry" and that she's not "trying to ignore me."

I don't know what to do anymore. She was one of the greatest things that's happened to my life, and suddenly she acts like I don't even exist. We used to talk and hang out all the time; now that seems gone. I'm fine with her not wanting a relationship. But I just want her to at least act like we acted back before we knew we liked each other. I'm fine with being just friends with her, but right now she's acting like I'm just an acquaintance. It makes no sense. I feel like drinking till I pass out now.

Thoughts?

https://static.bf2s.com/files/user/36793/marylandsig.jpg

2009-04-29 20:15:15

#753

ATG: Banned; +5,233|6676|Global Command

I swear to god i have read this before.
Haven't I?

2009-04-29 20:19:25

#754

Superior Mind: (not macbeth); +1,755|6840

She is just inexperienced with this sort of thing. You can't blame people for being immature. Just be real and straight with her. Show maturity. Perhaps she will be intrigued and mimic you. Then explain that the "before college, summer love" is a once in a lifetime, no consequences, relationship and you two should be having fun.

x

2009-04-29 20:20:54

#755

KEN-JENNINGS: I am all that is MOD!; +2,977|6779|949

You and her are normal teenagers. She probably is distant because she doesn't want to get hurt, so that's her way of coping. Sucks for you, but that's the way the cookie crumbles. Just rest assured that this is one of many experiences that sucks at the time but is essential for life's journey.

2009-04-29 20:31:17

#756

Hurricane2k9: Pendulous Sweaty Balls; +1,538|5849|College Park, MD

@Sup Mind what do you mean be real and straight with her? That's what I've been trying to do. Christ, last week at school I was giving goodbyes in front of the entire school and included her in them, saying "I'm so lucky to have met you and so glad I've been able to get to know you." That's pretty damn real IMO.

2009-04-29 20:38:43

#757

Superior Mind: (not macbeth); +1,755|6840

Hurricane2k9 wrote:
@Sup Mind what do you mean be real and straight with her? That's what I've been trying to do. Christ, last week at school I was giving goodbyes in front of the entire school and included her in them, saying "I'm so lucky to have met you and so glad I've been able to get to know you." That's pretty damn real IMO.

Just confront her with sincerity about how this all makes you feel. No need to flatter her. Tell her that she is being unreasonable.

x

2009-04-29 20:45:49

#758

loubot: O' HAL naw!; +470|6725|Columbus, OH

Have you asked her if she had a failed long-distance relationships before or some form of abandonment.
Maybe she knows she can't stay committed to a long-distance relationship and doing the wise choice of
breaking up now before things get ugly between the two of you.

It could be a number of other things but I'll leave it at that.

Time heals all wounds. I been down your path before. Don't let this set you back.
If you get depressed, fine a new hobby...one that is completely something you would not normally do (to make things interesting) and commit to it.

2009-04-29 20:45:51

#759

Hurricane2k9: Pendulous Sweaty Balls; +1,538|5849|College Park, MD

Superior Mind wrote:
Hurricane2k9 wrote:
@Sup Mind what do you mean be real and straight with her? That's what I've been trying to do. Christ, last week at school I was giving goodbyes in front of the entire school and included her in them, saying "I'm so lucky to have met you and so glad I've been able to get to know you." That's pretty damn real IMO.
Just confront her with sincerity about how this all makes you feel. No need to flatter her. Tell her that she is being unreasonable.

Should I do it tomorrow or should I do it next week? The thing is that prom is this Saturday and I think I'd rather not risk pissing her off / making her really fucking sad (she's one of those types who feel really bad when they realize they've made you feel bad) before prom and then having an awkward or miserable night on Saturday.

@Loubot she never really broke up with me because we were never really going out. She told me upfront that she didn't want to start a relationship for fear of it failing. But I feel like she's gone beyond "trying not to get too attached", to the other extreme of "ignoring him so I don't get too attached." And according to one of her friends, her past relationships weren't that great. As I said in the OP, I'm perfectly fine with being "just friends." Thing is she's not being like a friend right now. My real friends talk to me each day, say hi in the halls etc.

Last edited by Hurricane2k9 (2009-04-29 20:47:33)

2009-04-29 20:47:55

#760

ghettoperson: Member; +1,943|6796

If you got her pregnant then she'd be forced to talk to you. Think about it!

2009-04-29 20:53:05

#761

.:ronin:.|Patton: Respekct dad i love u always; +946|6956|Marathon, Florida Keys

If you have ever seen American Pie 2 you can understand the part where the kid says "I'd rather have you in my life as a friend oppose to not having you in my life at all." She doesn't want to get hurt that's why shes keeping her distance, she doesn't see an alternative as you aren't providing one.

https://i54.photobucket.com/albums/g117/patton1337/stats.jpg

2009-04-29 20:58:23

#762

Superior Mind: (not macbeth); +1,755|6840

Hurricane2k9 wrote:
Superior Mind wrote:
Hurricane2k9 wrote:
@Sup Mind what do you mean be real and straight with her? That's what I've been trying to do. Christ, last week at school I was giving goodbyes in front of the entire school and included her in them, saying "I'm so lucky to have met you and so glad I've been able to get to know you." That's pretty damn real IMO.
Just confront her with sincerity about how this all makes you feel. No need to flatter her. Tell her that she is being unreasonable.
Should I do it tomorrow or should I do it next week? The thing is that prom is this Saturday and I think I'd rather not risk pissing her off / making her really fucking sad (she's one of those types who feel really bad when they realize they've made you feel bad) before prom and then having an awkward or miserable night on Saturday.

@Loubot she never really broke up with me because we were never really going out. She told me upfront that she didn't want to start a relationship for fear of it failing. But I feel like she's gone beyond "trying not to get too attached", to the other extreme of "ignoring him so I don't get too attached." And according to one of her friends, her past relationships weren't that great. As I said in the OP, I'm perfectly fine with being "just friends." Thing is she's not being like a friend right now. My real friends talk to me each day, say hi in the halls etc.

Wait till after prom. Until then subtly be nice to her and try to hang out with her.

x

2009-04-29 21:51:25

#763

Flecco: iPod is broken.; +1,048|6812|NT, like Mick Dundee

This falls under the category of Girl Problems tbh.

Whoa... Can't believe these forums are still kicking.

2009-04-29 21:54:49

#764

lxcpikiman: imbad @ bf2; +70|6742|Toronto-Canada

TBH, she seems like she's not that into you to go on a relationship
but the thing that is weird is that apparently she doesn't want to be your friend either.
that girl has some issue brah.
edit: just for LuLz, pics?

Last edited by lxcpikiman (2009-04-29 21:56:02)

2009-04-29 22:00:29

#765

Wreckognize: Member; +294|6632

Sounds to me like she's still into you, but knows that you two can't be together, so she's keeping her distance till she gets her feelings in check. I'd say either giver her a little time and space to sort her shit out, or you can tell her what you just told us and see what happens.

2009-04-29 23:09:35

#766

The A W S M F O X: I Won't Deny It; +172|5831|SQUID

stick it in her pooper

2009-04-29 23:11:16

#767

AussieReaper: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°); +5,761|6300|what

Flecco wrote:
This falls under the category of Girl Problems tbh.

Yeah, the thread title was misleading also.

Hurricanes problem here is that she didn't suck....

2009-04-29 23:17:51

#768

The A W S M F O X: I Won't Deny It; +172|5831|SQUID

Flecco wrote:
This fails under the category of Girl Problems tbh.

amirite

2009-04-29 23:26:29

#769

Flecco: iPod is broken.; +1,048|6812|NT, like Mick Dundee

The A W S M F O X wrote:
stick it in her pooper

qft

AussieReaper wrote:
Flecco wrote:
This falls under the category of Girl Problems tbh.
Yeah, the thread title was misleading also.

Hurricanes problem here is that she didn't suck....

QFMFT

The A W S M F O X wrote:
Flecco wrote:
This fails under the category of Girl Problems tbh.
amirite

Yes, yes you are.

Whoa... Can't believe these forums are still kicking.

2009-04-30 00:17:18

#770

Gawwad: My way or Haddaway!; +212|6832|Espoo, Finland

Just tell her how you feel (possibly after prom) because to me it really seems like she doesn't understand what she's doing.

2009-04-30 00:36:14

#771

Andoura: Got loooollllll ?; +853|6786|Montreal, Qc, Canada

ATG wrote:
I swear to god i have read this before.
Haven't I?

This

2009-04-30 19:37:27

#772

Hurricane2k9: Pendulous Sweaty Balls; +1,538|5849|College Park, MD

Well we talked today. I think we worked it all out. She said she was really sorry but that she wasn't trying to ignore me. Her explanation was that she's "weird" and just "doesn't think about these sorts of things." Something like that.

I still feel something inside me when I see her talking with other guys, but that's just a sign that I have yet to fully get over her (or rather, get over the fact taht we won't have a relationship).

2009-04-30 19:40:40

#773

Deadmonkiefart: Floccinaucinihilipilificator; +177|6853

Happens all the time to people going off to college.

2009-04-30 19:50:47

#774

Macbeth: Banned; +2,444|5733

Get her pregnant she'll have to stay together with you after that.

2009-04-30 20:41:32

#775

AussieReaper: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°); +5,761|6300|what

Hurricane2k9 wrote:
She said she was really sorry but that she wasn't trying to ignore me. Her explanation was that she's "weird" and just "doesn't think about these sorts of things."

Stop over analysing it.

BF2S Forums The BF2s girl-problems thread

Lai wrote:

Tetn1s wrote:

Hurricane2k9 wrote:

Superior Mind wrote:

Hurricane2k9 wrote:

Hurricane2k9 wrote:

Superior Mind wrote:

Hurricane2k9 wrote:

Flecco wrote:

Flecco wrote:

The A W S M F O X wrote:

AussieReaper wrote:

Flecco wrote:

The A W S M F O X wrote:

Flecco wrote:

ATG wrote:

Hurricane2k9 wrote:

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