Macbeth
Banned
+2,444|5889

I have A Modest Proposal for how to pull the United States out of this recession.

Now whenever I walk through the streets of Jersey City, I quite often see poor women with at times five, six, or even seven children with them. Now given the current economic climate of this country and how these children will do no more then revert to crime and drugs when they grow up. Even more of these children will eventually have to grow up to live off of public assistance for the rest of their lives. I have come to a conclusion as to what to do with them.

But this is not just A Modest Proposal as to what to do with the children of the poor but a plan for all infants born the minute after my posting.

I have for many months been calculating the cost for raising a child to the age of 18. I have found that my Modest Proposal would benefit all involved; financially, socially, and save many children from a lifetime of poverty.

My ever so Modest Proposal would both cut down on the number of abortions and the amounts of filicide.

In the United States there was 4,315,000 infants born in 2007. If we were to take 3,000,000 of those children and set them aside for my Modest Proposal that would leave 1,315,000 left for further breeding.

Now to the use of these 3,000,000 children. I have heard from a friend of mine in Ireland that a infant born of only 12 pounds would make a wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted, baked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will equally serve in a fricassee or a ragout.

A new child could very well feed a small family for several days. If we were to give women jobs creating more children to be used as feed we could end the world food crisis. Any parents who refuse to eat their children could very well sell them to wealthy bankers as either food or slaves. The bankers having already driven people to this point surely will have no qualms about eating, forcing into work, or having sex with the children of the people they so cleverly screwed.

Further more our ever gracious friends the Chinese would love to buy our children for either feed or slaves to relieve their over worked people.

I profess, in the sincerity of my heart, that I have not the least personal interest in endeavoring to promote this necessary work, having no other motive than the public good of my country, by advancing our trade, providing for infants, relieving the poor, and giving some pleasure to the rich. I have no children by which I can propose to get a single penny, children aren't my thing and my girlfriend is infertile.

Spoiler (highlight to read):
Before you flame. Look up Jonathan Swift and see the similarities between his most famous work and mine and see how it fits into today.
AussieReaper
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
+5,761|6456|what

uevjHEYFFQ wrote:

Further more our ever gracious friends the Chinese would love to buy our children for either feed or slaves to relieve their over worked people.
http://forums.bf2s.com/viewtopic.php?pi … 7#p2484097
https://i.imgur.com/maVpUMN.png
Flaming_Maniac
prince of insufficient light
+2,490|7010|67.222.138.85
Just keep them from getting an education, so that we have an uneducated workforce that can compete with immigrants again.
Macbeth
Banned
+2,444|5889

TheAussieReaper wrote:

uevjHEYFFQ wrote:

Further more our ever gracious friends the Chinese would love to buy our children for either feed or slaves to relieve their over worked people.
http://forums.bf2s.com/viewtopic.php?pi … 7#p2484097

uevjHEYFFQ wrote:

Look up Jonathan Swift and see the similarities between his most famous work and mine and see how it fits into today.
AussieReaper
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
+5,761|6456|what

uevjHEYFFQ wrote:

Look up Jonathan Swift and see the similarities between his most famous work and mine and see how it fits into today.
Yes it was his modest proposal.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/eb/Jonathan_swift.JPG

I don't know why you keep going back to the Chinese though.
https://i.imgur.com/maVpUMN.png
KEN-JENNINGS
I am all that is MOD!
+2,984|6936|949

So what's your point?
Flaming_Maniac
prince of insufficient light
+2,490|7010|67.222.138.85

KEN-JENNINGS wrote:

So what's your point?
Dude. Are you thick? Make a generation of baby-eating cannibals.
Macbeth
Banned
+2,444|5889

TheAussieReaper wrote:

uevjHEYFFQ wrote:

Look up Jonathan Swift and see the similarities between his most famous work and mine and see how it fits into today.
Yes it was his modest proposal.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/c … _swift.JPG

I don't know why you keep going back to the Chinese though.
Ah during the writing of his essay the Irish were being screwed by the English. Today the American are getting screwed by the Chinese.

KEN-JENNINGS wrote:

So what's your point?
Something about social conservatism. I'll be back later to make it make sense. A little.

Last edited by uevjHEYFFQ (2009-01-27 18:16:10)

nickb64
formerly from OC (it's EXACTLY like on tv)[truth]
+77|5915|Greatest Nation on Earth(USA)
Holy crap, just read Swift's Modest proposal in my English 3 class today. His is better than this.
Mitch
16 more years
+877|6829|South Florida
Talk all you want, but are you going to stick the needle in the little infant to kill it. Are you gunna cut it up and dump it in a fucking pot? Thats fucking sick.

And nine months for a fucking week meal is stupid anyways.

Unless this is a joke, plz die.
15 more years! 15 more years!
Macbeth
Banned
+2,444|5889

Mitch wrote:

Talk all you want, but are you going to stick the needle in the little infant to kill it. Are you gunna cut it up and dump it in a fucking pot? Thats fucking sick.

And nine months for a fucking week meal is stupid anyways.

Unless this is a joke, plz die.
I guess you decide to not read the entire thread or the spoiler. Or you read the spoiler and decided to disregard it. Or you did all three and still do not know the hell we are talking about.

Either way well done.

Last edited by uevjHEYFFQ (2009-01-27 18:51:37)

Flaming_Maniac
prince of insufficient light
+2,490|7010|67.222.138.85

Mitch wrote:

Talk all you want, but are you going to stick the needle in the little infant to kill it. Are you gunna cut it up and dump it in a fucking pot? Thats fucking sick.

And nine months for a fucking week meal is stupid anyways.

Unless this is a joke, plz die.
It is a joke, and that was made clear to such excess it wasn't really funny anymore.

"Better to keep your mouth closed and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt"
AussieReaper
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
+5,761|6456|what

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

"Better to keep your mouth closed and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt"
What does that mean? Better say something or they'll think you're stupid.

Takes one to know one.
https://i.imgur.com/maVpUMN.png
Flaming_Maniac
prince of insufficient light
+2,490|7010|67.222.138.85

TheAussieReaper wrote:

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

"Better to keep your mouth closed and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt"
What does that mean? Better say something or they'll think you're stupid.

Takes one to know one.
...

It means while if you don't say anything people will think you are probably a fool, but if you open your trap you will undoubtedly be a fool.
AussieReaper
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
+5,761|6456|what

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

It means while if you don't say anything people will think you are probably a fool, but if you open your trap you will undoubtedly be a fool.
Swish!

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0701160/quotes
https://i.imgur.com/maVpUMN.png
Flaming_Maniac
prince of insufficient light
+2,490|7010|67.222.138.85

TheAussieReaper wrote:

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

It means while if you don't say anything people will think you are probably a fool, but if you open your trap you will undoubtedly be a fool.
Swish!

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0701160/quotes
Apologies for my lack of intimate knowledge of a cartoon.

excellent execution though
AussieReaper
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
+5,761|6456|what

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

Apologies for my lack of intimate knowledge of a cartoon.
Irony?

https://forums.bf2s.com/img/avatars/8777.gif

*okay i'll stop the derail from going further* lol
https://i.imgur.com/maVpUMN.png
Flaming_Maniac
prince of insufficient light
+2,490|7010|67.222.138.85

TheAussieReaper wrote:

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

Apologies for my lack of intimate knowledge of a cartoon.
Irony?

http://forums.bf2s.com/img/avatars/8777.gif

*okay i'll stop the derail from going further* lol
That's a comic, not a cartoon, much more high-brow.
DesertFox-
The very model of a modern major general
+796|6988|United States of America

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

TheAussieReaper wrote:

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

Apologies for my lack of intimate knowledge of a cartoon.
Irony?

http://forums.bf2s.com/img/avatars/8777.gif

*okay i'll stop the derail from going further* lol
That's a comic, not a cartoon, much more high-brow.
Indeed
https://sheeats.files.wordpress.com/2008/01/comic-book-guy-13018.jpg
Kmar
Truth is my Bitch
+5,695|6904|132 and Bush

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

Just keep them from getting an education, so that we have an uneducated workforce that can compete with immigrants again.
Xbone Stormsurgezz
ATG
Banned
+5,233|6833|Global Command
Analysis; punt to EE.
Dilbert_X
The X stands for
+1,817|6410|eXtreme to the maX
Thats like feeding grain to cows to make beef to feed to people.
Just eat the grain, its a lot simpler.
Fuck Israel

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