So most of my friends are home from college for the summer and we decided to open the summer with a party. Nothing too big, just a gathering of the friends. We all agreed to make 'Jungle Juice' (handles of cheap liquor + soda + kool aid) and then the girls showed up. A lot of them.
Nice! This night should equal a sure hook up. Oh man was I wrong.
A friend of mine introduced me to this girl named Katie. She's 19 and a hottie. We hit it off pretty quick with a few laughs and drinks. About 2 hours or so later (close to 1 A.M. now) she tells me she has to go home.
What!? Who leaves a party so early? I asked her the basic questions as to why depart from a great party so damned early.
* Are you sick?
* Is there something wrong?
* Do you need a ride home?
She shakes her head in embarrassment and doesn't answer me. I'm thinking maybe she had a boyfriend and he showed up or something. I was wrong. I'm very drunk by this time. So I pulled her aside and asked her what it was that's making her leave.
She tells me she has a baby at home.
Once the initial shock subsided, I started laughing and turned away shaking my head.
She immediately explodes screaming at me as to how I'm suck an asshole. Oh great, super bitch has an attitude now. Time to put her in her place. I couldn't believe that this whore has an 11 month old baby at home (which I learned after super bitch left). She shrieked about how I wanted to just get her drunk and hook up with her. Now, as my ears are bleeding, I raise my voice and exclaim how not only did I tell her to stop drinking but I took her last cup of jungle juice away from her. Now that Super bitch's argument was squashed, I thought I would just go in for the kill.
Me: "Wow, you should have gotten an abortion."
She then burst into tears and ran out. Everyone who was there stood / sat there in shock while I laughed and started drinking her cup of jungle juice which she was not going to finish. I win.
A few minutes after she left, a few of my friends congratulated me on my words and swore to me that they told me she had a kid before she got there. I, honestly, had no idea she had a kid until she told me.
I celebrated my victory by sleeping on a raft in the pool with half of cup of jungle juice left.
Nice! This night should equal a sure hook up. Oh man was I wrong.
A friend of mine introduced me to this girl named Katie. She's 19 and a hottie. We hit it off pretty quick with a few laughs and drinks. About 2 hours or so later (close to 1 A.M. now) she tells me she has to go home.
What!? Who leaves a party so early? I asked her the basic questions as to why depart from a great party so damned early.
* Are you sick?
* Is there something wrong?
* Do you need a ride home?
She shakes her head in embarrassment and doesn't answer me. I'm thinking maybe she had a boyfriend and he showed up or something. I was wrong. I'm very drunk by this time. So I pulled her aside and asked her what it was that's making her leave.
She tells me she has a baby at home.
Once the initial shock subsided, I started laughing and turned away shaking my head.
She immediately explodes screaming at me as to how I'm suck an asshole. Oh great, super bitch has an attitude now. Time to put her in her place. I couldn't believe that this whore has an 11 month old baby at home (which I learned after super bitch left). She shrieked about how I wanted to just get her drunk and hook up with her. Now, as my ears are bleeding, I raise my voice and exclaim how not only did I tell her to stop drinking but I took her last cup of jungle juice away from her. Now that Super bitch's argument was squashed, I thought I would just go in for the kill.
Me: "Wow, you should have gotten an abortion."
She then burst into tears and ran out. Everyone who was there stood / sat there in shock while I laughed and started drinking her cup of jungle juice which she was not going to finish. I win.
A few minutes after she left, a few of my friends congratulated me on my words and swore to me that they told me she had a kid before she got there. I, honestly, had no idea she had a kid until she told me.
I celebrated my victory by sleeping on a raft in the pool with half of cup of jungle juice left.