Cougar
Banned
+1,962|6784|Dallas
Well, it's official.  School is out and the pre-pubescent noobs are arriving on the internet, BF2s and BF2 in droves.  It's kind of like the plague of locusts in the bible, you know they are coming and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it.  I disagree.  Most children can be swayed more easily with a kind word than with a iron fist.  I personally have already managed to get two children to calm down and take their Ritalin by simply sending them a PM and nicely explaining to them what they shouldn't do if they don't want to be eaten alive by angry forum members.  However, the children are not what I hate, what I hate are the stupid idiots who encourage them and give them a sense of "that's ok because he is doing it".  If you are one of the people I'm about to list, please shoot yourself in the face with a high caliber rifle.  These are the people I hate.

1. The Snitch

The Snitch is simply a bastard.  The Snitch is the kind of person that see's a guy on a random server doing something wrong and feels the need to alert the entire BF2 community as to what crime this guy has committed, like we care or can do anything about it.  If you do a search for the word "cheater" it comes back with six pages of results.  We understand that people cheat, hack, glitch, prone spam, bunny hop, dolphin dive, aimbot, vehicle whore, etc etc etc etc.  WE KNOW!  So you caught a guy on your server in the Karkand wall glitch ehh?  Think you should make a thread over it ehh?  How's about not.  He's in the same spot, doing the same thing, and people on the server are reacting in the SAME way as the last guy who made a thread on it.  Even if you ban the assholes doing it....THEY WILL GO SOMEWHERE ELSE AND CONTINUE.  I have 8 bans on my stats and I don't remember where any of them came from and I don't care.  Do you honestly think these guys do?  Fuck no they don't.

Stop.  Making.  Threads.  About.  This.  Shit.

2. The "OMG" Guy

The "OMG Guy" is a dumbass by merit.  He thinks every little thing is a miracle sent down to him by the hand of God himself.  Some examples of the "OMG Guy" are the "OMG look at this guys stats!!", "OMG there is teddy bears in the box!!", "OMG Volx is No.1 now!!!", "OMG I got promoted!!" threads, to name a few.  The "OMG Guy" needs to understand that, unless he found a secret room full of naked women having an orgy with The Harlem Globetrotters, we really don't care, OR we have already seen it from the last 17 OMG Guys. 

3. The Obsessive Compulsive Statistical Comparison Addict Guy

The Obsessive Compulsive Statistical Comparison Addict Guy, feels the need to compare EVERYTHING to EVERYTHING else, as to think that maybe, somehow he may be able to find the one invincible super weapon in BF2.  Nostradamus says "There isn't one dumbass.  Rock, paper, scissors you dipshit.".  You may have seen the dog crap threads these guys make before.  L96A1vsM24, MK3A1vsDAO12, M1A1vsT90, USAvsPLA, Coke vs Pepsi, Shit vs Brussels Sprouts, Vagina vs No Vagina.   It goes on forever.  The Obsessive Compulsive Statistical Comparison Addict Guy needs to realize that everyone has their own preference, there is no super weapon, people are always going to disagree on shit and the thread you're about to make has probably already been made.  Twice.

4. The Sniper Video Spammers

It's the same thing.  All of them.  Have you ever seen an original movie and thought to yourself, "hey that was pretty good"?  Yeah, me too.   Then people come along and remake it, twice, three, four, even five times?  By the fifth time the movie just blows rotten ass, well it's the same thing with the sniper video's, only they are on or around remake No. 2,348.  It's the same thing, different actor, different music, different location.  What's the fucking point?  We understand now that you can kill people from a long way away, congrats.  Want to impress me?  Make a video of yourself going 50-1 and capping 15 flags in one round using nothing but a pistol.  That's pretty much the only thing I haven't seen yet, and rest assured it would probably stay original because I doubt just "anybody" can do that, unlike a sniper rifle where it is just point and click.

5. The "This One Time" Guys

"This one time I was walking down the street in Karkand and this dude came around the corner so we started shooting at each other but we both missed so we had to reload and then we shot again and we both missed so we had to reload again and then we ran out of ammo so we started pistol fighting and we missed so we started reloading and then we shot at each other some more and then we ran out of ammo again and then we pulled out our grenades but we both through them over each others shoulders and so we pulled out our knives and we started running at each other and all of the sudden a car came out of nowhere and ran over him and I was standing there laughing so hard and all of the sudden some artillery came down and killed me and then some random guy came and teabagged me so I tried to get the admin to ban him cause that was gay but the admin wouldn't do it so I left and decided to come here to BF2s and tell all of you about because it was funny and it sucked at the same time and the admin was a faggit and needs to have the ROE guys take his admin away from him and wipe his stats because he is not a good admin so +1 karma me if you would because I want to be l33t."

Shut the fuck up with that shit.

6. The "Punk"

"The admin over at ______ is an asshole and he banned me for no reason."  So what?  Go somewhere else.  There are thousands of servers out there and you get worked up over a jackass admin on one server?  You got punked, picked on, abused by the admin.  There is nothing you can other than leave or report them, and this isn't where you report them.  This also isn't the place to report stat-padders or whores.  You know that BF2:RS place everyone hates?  Yeah go make it their problem.

7. The Children

Fact: The Children are hated because they do one of the things listed above.  Why?  Because they saw someone else do it.

Stop doing it and they will stop doing it.  Help keep the forums an enjoyable experience until August and beyond.
|Vap0rXX|
Member
+10|6602
HAHAHA YES!!! So granted, I've noticed this over the past few days and soo many "OMFG HAX!!" from little first class privates.

+1 lol
spawnofthemist
Banned
+1,128|6661|Burmecia, Land of the Rain
Cougar.. i've been waiting for your next one of these guides.. and i've not been let down..

top quality.

(i might even not derail this thread.. nah.. i wont derail it)
scottomus0
Teh forum ghey!
+172|6656|Wigan. Manchester. England.
rofl aceee
VeNg3nCe^
¦Tactics Øver Principles¦
+314|6725|Antarctica

Cougar wrote:

Well, it's official.  School is out and the pre-pubescent noobs are arriving on the internet, BF2s and BF2 in droves.  It's kind of like the plague of locusts in the bible, you know they are coming and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it.  I disagree.  Most children can be swayed more easily with a kind word than with a iron fist.  I personally have already managed to get two children to calm down and take their Ritalin by simply sending them a PM and nicely explaining to them what they shouldn't do if they don't want to be eaten alive by angry forum members.  However, the children are not what I hate, what I hate are the stupid idiots who encourage them and give them a sense of "that's ok because he is doing it".  If you are one of the people I'm about to list, please shoot yourself in the face with a high caliber rifle.  These are the people I hate.

1. The Snitch

The Snitch is simply a bastard.  The Snitch is the kind of person that see's a guy on a random server doing something wrong and feels the need to alert the entire BF2 community as to what crime this guy has committed, like we care or can do anything about it.  If you do a search for the word "cheater" it comes back with six pages of results.  We understand that people cheat, hack, glitch, prone spam, bunny hop, dolphin dive, aimbot, vehicle whore, etc etc etc etc.  WE KNOW!  So you caught a guy on your server in the Karkand wall glitch ehh?  Think you should make a thread over it ehh?  How's about not.  He's in the same spot, doing the same thing, and people on the server are reacting in the SAME way as the last guy who made a thread on it.  Even if you ban the assholes doing it....THEY WILL GO SOMEWHERE ELSE AND CONTINUE.  I have 8 bans on my stats and I don't remember where any of them came from and I don't care.  Do you honestly think these guys do?  Fuck no they don't.

Stop.  Making.  Threads.  About.  This.  Shit.

2. The "OMG" Guy

The "OMG Guy" is a dumbass by merit.  He thinks every little thing is a miracle sent down to him by the hand of God himself.  Some examples of the "OMG Guy" are the "OMG look at this guys stats!!", "OMG there is teddy bears in the box!!", "OMG Volx is No.1 now!!!", "OMG I got promoted!!" threads, to name a few.  The "OMG Guy" needs to understand that, unless he found a secret room full of naked women having an orgy with The Harlem Globetrotters, we really don't care, OR we have already seen it from the last 17 OMG Guys. 

3. The Obsessive Compulsive Statistical Comparison Addict Guy

The Obsessive Compulsive Statistical Comparison Addict Guy, feels the need to compare EVERYTHING to EVERYTHING else, as to think that maybe, somehow he may be able to find the one invincible super weapon in BF2.  Nostradamus says "There isn't one dumbass.  Rock, paper, scissors you dipshit.".  You may have seen the dog crap threads these guys make before.  L96A1vsM24, MK3A1vsDAO12, M1A1vsT90, USAvsPLA, Coke vs Pepsi, Shit vs Brussels Sprouts, Vagina vs No Vagina.   It goes on forever.  The Obsessive Compulsive Statistical Comparison Addict Guy needs to realize that everyone has their own preference, there is no super weapon, people are always going to disagree on shit and the thread you're about to make has probably already been made.  Twice.

4. The Sniper Video Spammers

It's the same thing.  All of them.  Have you ever seen an original movie and thought to yourself, "hey that was pretty good"?  Yeah, me too.   Then people come along and remake it, twice, three, four, even five times?  By the fifth time the movie just blows rotten ass, well it's the same thing with the sniper video's, only they are on or around remake No. 2,348.  It's the same thing, different actor, different music, different location.  What's the fucking point?  We understand now that you can kill people from a long way away, congrats.  Want to impress me?  Make a video of yourself going 50-1 and capping 15 flags in one round using nothing but a pistol.  That's pretty much the only thing I haven't seen yet, and rest assured it would probably stay original because I doubt just "anybody" can do that, unlike a sniper rifle where it is just point and click.

5. The "This One Time" Guys

"This one time I was walking down the street in Karkand and this dude came around the corner so we started shooting at each other but we both missed so we had to reload and then we shot again and we both missed so we had to reload again and then we ran out of ammo so we started pistol fighting and we missed so we started reloading and then we shot at each other some more and then we ran out of ammo again and then we pulled out our grenades but we both through them over each others shoulders and so we pulled out our knives and we started running at each other and all of the sudden a car came out of nowhere and ran over him and I was standing there laughing so hard and all of the sudden some artillery came down and killed me and then some random guy came and teabagged me so I tried to get the admin to ban him cause that was gay but the admin wouldn't do it so I left and decided to come here to BF2s and tell all of you about because it was funny and it sucked at the same time and the admin was a faggit and needs to have the ROE guys take his admin away from him and wipe his stats because he is not a good admin so +1 karma me if you would because I want to be l33t."

Shut the fuck up with that shit.

6. The "Punk"

"The admin over at ______ is an asshole and he banned me for no reason."  So what?  Go somewhere else.  There are thousands of servers out there and you get worked up over a jackass admin on one server?  You got punked, picked on, abused by the admin.  There is nothing you can other than leave or report them, and this isn't where you report them.  This also isn't the place to report stat-padders or whores.  You know that BF2:RS place everyone hates?  Yeah go make it their problem.

7. The Children

Fact: The Children are hated because they do one of the things listed above.  Why?  Because they saw someone else do it.

Stop doing it and they will stop doing it.  Help keep the forums an enjoyable experience until August and beyond.
I don't see what this has to do with age.   The majority of ppl I see doing this are the 30+ realism noobs who want everything to be uber lifelike and to remove anything thats not point click.
TriggerHappy998
just nothing
+387|6867|-
lolz internets.
Crotin
Member
+0|6548|Los Angeles
lol @ secret room with globetrotters...funny post man, very true shit.  Oh yea...shit owns brussel sprouts. Dont ask how i know....*walks away from computer*.
genius_man16
Platinum Star whore
+365|6697|Middle of nowhere

Cougar wrote:

5. The "This One Time" Guys

"This one time I was walking down the street in Karkand and this dude came around the corner so we started shooting at each other but we both missed so we had to reload and then we shot again and we both missed so we had to reload again and then we ran out of ammo so we started pistol fighting and we missed so we started reloading and then we shot at each other some more and then we ran out of ammo again and then we pulled out our grenades but we both through them over each others shoulders and so we pulled out our knives and we started running at each other and all of the sudden a car came out of nowhere and ran over him and I was standing there laughing so hard and all of the sudden some artillery came down and killed me and then some random guy came and teabagged me so I tried to get the admin to ban him cause that was gay but the admin wouldn't do it so I left and decided to come here to BF2s and tell all of you about because it was funny and it sucked at the same time and the admin was a faggit and needs to have the ROE guys take his admin away from him and wipe his stats because he is not a good admin so +1 karma me if you would because I want to be l33t."
best one XD

now that's funny
shice
Member
+9|6534|every1 h8's Germany
Nice text. Laughed my ass off
Nr.5 is my favourite! Godlike!
Home
Section.80
+447|6867|Seattle, Washington, USA

GG. Cougar wins.
Kaosdad
Whisky Tango Foxtrot?
+201|6698|Broadlands, VA
I am not worthy!!! +1 bro.

But....


OMG..once I saw this sniper video about this guy who SAID he compared his stats to mine and said he pwned me, so I went on this server to try & pwn the guy but the admin kicked & banned me because I saw a wall glitcher kiss Jesus.


Really......



Over there ->



Kimmy saw it too.

Last edited by Kaosdad008 (2006-07-05 06:13:16)

S3v3N
lolwut?
+685|6537|Montucky
i think you forgot one, but its more for the "older" generation:

The Uber Political Debate Guy - i can't come up with a fantastic explanation that would even equal to that of Cougar's evil genius..
Cougar
Banned
+1,962|6784|Dallas

VeNg3nCe^ wrote:

I don't see what this has to do with age.   The majority of ppl I see doing this are the 30+ realism noobs who want everything to be uber lifelike and to remove anything thats not point click.
The thread is directed at older people.  If older people don't act the fool, neither will the children.  Read again.
Cursed You
Member
+64|6607|Idaho
Well Cougar when I get my fraps registered I'll make that video of going 50:1 and capping 15 flags :p

And I will be an "OMG guy" when I get promoted to Master Sarge.  But granted I'll do it in the proper topic.

My stories are bitchin


Good post though.  If I had any karma I'd give you some.  But thats just a meager way of showing how good your post is.  If you cant take my own personal word for it then go eat some bagels...
Hyper
Banned
+154|6770
this one time at band camp.....
Stags
Member
+26|6675
Rofl.  Nice.  I have to admit I was tempted to make a sniper video about a year ago.  Then after doing some research, I saw there was way to many of them.  A documentary would be better.

Anyways, nice post.  :thumbs up:
imdead
Death StatPadder
+228|6788|Human Meat Shield
eh...

Its a game.. who the hell cares what anybody else does, I've been preaching this since Sept 05 when I first started.
DaReJa
BF2s US Server Admin
+257|6646|Los Angeles, California, US.

spawnofthemist wrote:

Cougar.. i've been waiting for your next one of these guides.. and i've not been let down..

top quality.

(i might even not derail this thread.. nah.. i wont derail it)
Agreed.
Battlelog: DaReJa
MyBFi/BF3i Admin

AKA DanielRJ
GameSurge IRC Network, Support Agent and Staff
Phuzion IRC Network, Support Director and Operator
Slink
Member
+17|6716
This man is my favorite.  Ever.
Capt_ghost89
run and gun
+4|6532
i know exactly what you mean, i was playing a game today on warlord, and we wiped the floor with the other team 2 times, and by the third game we just kept getting messages like, OMG YOU HAX, stop HAXORINGS things like that, and all it did was make us win the round faster because they were just horrible.

+1 for  you
Fredrik
i hate you all
+201|6668|Norway
This post should be featured!
stryyker
bad touch
+1,682|6739|California

nice.
M_Harrower
Will code HTML for food
+114|6593
Very nice guide to people you hate, made me laugh.

Capt_ghost89 wrote:

i know exactly what you mean, i was playing a game today on warlord, and we wiped the floor with the other team 2 times, and by the third game we just kept getting messages like, OMG YOU HAX, stop HAXORINGS things like that, and all it did was make us win the round faster because they were just horrible.
I've spotted a "This One Time" Guy.
-=NHB=- Bananahands
Member
+58|6577

M_Harrower wrote:

Very nice guide to people you hate, made me laugh.

Capt_ghost89 wrote:

i know exactly what you mean, i was playing a game today on warlord, and we wiped the floor with the other team 2 times, and by the third game we just kept getting messages like, OMG YOU HAX, stop HAXORINGS things like that, and all it did was make us win the round faster because they were just horrible.
I've spotted a "This One Time" Guy.
Haha nice call.
Defiance
Member
+438|6690

Cougar will never make a good father, and if he already is a father, his kids are due to start cutting their wrists anytime now out of depression from sexual abusing from Cougar whilst he chanted "FUCK IT WITH THE SNIPER VIDEOS! FUCK IT WITH THE SNIPER VIDEOS!"

I'm 14, schools out and I don't do any of those things you list.

But you'll call me a punk for the fun of it. GG, go outside.

Last edited by Defiance (2006-07-03 20:39:33)

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