i got gold commander too..
it just takes patience, and an attitude that works wirth squads..
i find that, if im lucky, i mean REALLY lucky in a round, i might get 1 or 2 decent squads that listen to commander, and even then, these squads might only have 2 or 3 people in each.
what i tend to do as commander is ignore choke points on the map and encourage players to go for remote caps. eg, on karkand, i NEVER use uav on hotel... people become DUMB about capping it. Tickets DISAPPEAR over this one cap. at map start, i ctrl-A and request all squads to attack, say train wreck. any squads that go straight there are my pets, and i prioritise them throughout the rest of the map, as long as they prove ddecent. there is no point in uav-ing hotel as it usually just turns red and goes BBEEEEEEEEEEEEP. i may arty or supply drop it, if there is no need elsewhere, but thats it.
good squads are what wins the round. its up to a commander to nurture these guys and maximise them, remember, most of your team wont even listen to commander, all they want is supplies and uav over their heads, but most dont go where the match needs them
u gotta encourage diverse play.