Best best joke

2011-12-14 17:58:38

#901

Dauntless: Admin; +2,249|7298|London

Toilet Sex wrote:
one for you cammpoo

I phoned my work this morning and said, "Sorry boss, I can't come in today, I have a wee cough."

He said, "You have a wee cough?"

I said, "Really? Cheers boss, see you next week!"

OH BECAUSE IT SOUNDS LIKE WEEK OFF WHEN YOU SAY IT OUTLOUD!

2011-12-14 18:52:47

#902

AussieReaper: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°); +5,761|6708|what

Dauntless wrote:
Toilet Sex wrote:
one for you cammpoo

I phoned my work this morning and said, "Sorry boss, I can't come in today, I have a wee cough."

He said, "You have a wee cough?"

I said, "Really? Cheers boss, see you next week!"
OH BECAUSE IT SOUNDS LIKE WEEK OFF WHEN YOU SAY IT OUTLOUD!

thatsthejoke.jpg

2011-12-19 03:57:03

#903

Nappy: Apprentice; +151|6785|NSW, Australia

Kampframmer wrote:
I always get the impression that in Australia you dont have to feel guilty or racist when making fun of Abo's.
It seems like you have one group of people that everyone ridicules and nobody minds.

Maybe if abo's didnt anything except be dole bluders, sniff petrol and cause trouble they would get some respect
They get so many benefits its ridiculous. The kids get free marks in the HSC for being abo.
Free money from the government, and its never enough they always want more.
Always whinging people took their land and all this bullshit

They should have fought for it like native American Indians or NZ Maori's

2011-12-19 04:08:02

#904

KuSTaV: noice; +947|7067|Gold Coast

They want to live in the desert anyway.

I am okay with this.

noice

https://static.bf2s.com/files/user/26774/awsmsanta.png

2011-12-19 04:09:19

#905

Dilbert_X: The X stands for; +1,836|6661|eXtreme to the maX

From what I've seen there's very little anti-abo sentiment - except from people >65-70 who think they were outstandingly clever to be born white.

/offtopic

Fuck Israel

2011-12-19 22:45:28

#906

Miggle: FUCK UBISOFT; +1,411|7297|FUCK UBISOFT

Nappy wrote:
They should have fought for it like native American Indians or NZ Maori's

What the fuck does that mean?

Their ancestors fought for it. They did jack shit.

2012-01-12 07:25:25

#907

PrivateVendetta: I DEMAND XMAS THEME; +704|6747|Roma

Antony Worrall Thompson stole some cheddar? How dairy!

I went to see Ready Steady Cook the other day. It was fantastic. Antony Worrall Thompson absolutely stole the show.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was stuffed up Worrall Thompson's jacket.

Antony Worrall Thompson has been caught shoplifting milk, yeast and flour from his local Tesco. He's clearly run out of dough.

There's no such thing as a free lunch. Unless you're using the Worrall Thompson recipe book.

Antony Worrall Thompson stole some cheese and wine.And that was only for starters.

Wozza was caught stealing cheese from Tesco. He should have done it more Caerphilly.

I don't care what he's done, I'm still hanging on to my Antony Worrall Thompson blender. Better the Breville you know.

https://static.bf2s.com/files/user/29388/stopped%20scrolling%21.png

2012-01-12 07:34:23

#908

1927: The oldest chav in the world; +2,423|7229|Cardiff, Capital of Wales

Why did the seamen cross the road?

It was my first wank in 2 weeks.

(I also posted this in the worst joke thread)

2012-01-14 15:45:23

#909

-Sh1fty-: plundering yee booty; +510|6029|Ventura, California

Friend at work had me laughing hard on this one.

What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Licksalottapus

And above your tomb, the stars will belong to us.

2012-01-14 15:50:37

#910

FatherTed: xD; +3,936|7056|so randum

cripes

Small hourglass island
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella

2012-01-14 15:52:31

#911

Hurricane2k9: Pendulous Sweaty Balls; +1,538|6257|College Park, MD

then they lynched a gay guy

https://static.bf2s.com/files/user/36793/marylandsig.jpg

2012-01-16 01:27:32

#912

1927: The oldest chav in the world; +2,423|7229|Cardiff, Capital of Wales

Little Billy is in school and the teacher says:

Right Bill, we are going to have a maths lesson here.

You have 5 sweets in your pocket Billy, Mohammed asks for one.

How many sweets do you have left?

5 Miss

2012-01-16 01:29:21

#913

Jaekus: I'm the matchstick that you'll never lose; +957|5734|Sydney

What is a duck?

When one of its legs are both the same.

2012-01-16 03:13:50

#914

Camm: Feeding the Cats.; +761|5524|Dundee, Scotland.

Jaekus wrote:
What is a duck?

When one of its legs are both the same.

FHM?

for a fatty you're a serious intellectual lightweight.

2012-01-16 03:23:43

#915

AussieReaper: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°); +5,761|6708|what

-Sh1fty- wrote:
Friend at work had me laughing hard on this one.

What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Licksalottapus

It's funny cause you don't believe in dinosaurs and hate gays.

2012-02-14 15:24:50

#916

Jaekus: I'm the matchstick that you'll never lose; +957|5734|Sydney

What's six inches and not getting sucked this Valentines Day?

Spoiler (highlight to read):
Whitney Houston's crack pipe

2012-02-14 15:25:39

#917

FatherTed: xD; +3,936|7056|so randum

hahahaha

Small hourglass island
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella

2012-02-17 00:46:11

#918

DonFck: Hibernator; +3,227|7187|Finland

Jaekus wrote:
What is a duck?

When one of its legs are both the same.

What's the difference between a fish?

It can neither ride a bike.

I need around tree fiddy.

2012-02-21 11:50:12

#919

bugz: Fission Mailed; +3,311|6867

Your mum's so fat she doesn't support files larger than 4GB

Steam: http://steamcommunity.com/id/ebug122

2012-02-21 12:12:47

#920

west-phoenix-az: Guns don't kill people. . . joe bidens advice does; +632|6945

https://i127.photobucket.com/albums/p123/west-phoenix-az/Gifs%20and%20Forums/yo_momma_so_fat.jpg

Jaekus wrote:
What's six inches and not getting sucked this Valentines Day?

Spoiler (highlight to read):
Whitney Houston's crack pipe

Spoiler (highlight to read):
That's a long crack pipe.

https://i127.photobucket.com/albums/p123/west-phoenix-az/BF2S/bf2s_sig_9mmbrass.jpg

2012-03-01 10:00:14

#921

Camm: Feeding the Cats.; +761|5524|Dundee, Scotland.

The Beastie Boys are launching a new five-part fanzine, documenting their rise to stardom.

Parts A to D will be freely available in the shops for general purchase but, consistent with their band's ethos, you'll have to fight for your right to Part E.

for a fatty you're a serious intellectual lightweight.

2012-03-07 08:36:49

#922

PrivateVendetta: I DEMAND XMAS THEME; +704|6747|Roma

In a Tottenham church Sunday morning a preacher said, "Anyone with
'special needs' who wants to be prayed over, please come forward to the
front by the altar."

With that, Leroy got in line, and when it was his turn, the Preacher
asked, "Leroy, what do you want me to pray about for you?"

Leroy replied, "Preacher, I need you to pray for help with my
hearing." The preacher put one finger of one hand in Leroy's ear,
placed his other hand on top of Leroy's head, and then prayed and
prayed and the whole congregation joined in with great enthusiasm.

After a few minutes, the preacher removed his hands, stood back and
asked, "Leroy, how is your hearing now?"
Leroy answered, "I don't know. It ain't 'til Thursday."

2012-03-07 10:25:15

#923

The_Guardsman: Tally Ho!!; +81|7300|I'm not sure.... Buts its dark

I got mugged last night. 4 big bastards kicked the shit out of me.
Against all odds l managed to knock one out....
Probably not the best time for a wank but it could of been my last!

2012-03-07 10:29:19

#924

CC-Marley: Member; +407|7384

meh

2012-03-09 20:05:57

#925

eusgen: Nugget; +402|7348|Jupiter

CC-Marley wrote:
meh

BF2S Forums Best best joke

Toilet Sex wrote:

Dauntless wrote:

Toilet Sex wrote:

Kampframmer wrote:

Nappy wrote:

Jaekus wrote:

-Sh1fty- wrote:

Jaekus wrote:

Jaekus wrote:

CC-Marley wrote:

Board footer