BF2S Forums Body Image

i asked my wife once what she saw in me. she said the part in my hair.

we worked at the same place for a few months, and it wasn't til we wound up at the same bar one night after work, that we hit it off. we became good friends, and more . . .

now the part in my hair that she sees is grey, and thinner. i love her more now than i first did, and understand the difference between plato and eros.

her looks caught my eye, but didn't turn my head. she thought of me as someone who would fight at the drop of a hat ( i got us eventually 86'd from that bar) and until we talked the spark wasn't there. looks do mean something, just not everything.

I think girls from california are hit the hardest because of the media and what not

I tried convincing my ex-girlfriend (who wasn't skinny but really wasn't overly fat either... no flat stomach for sure, but definitely not a chunker) she was beautiful all the time and she just wouldn't believe me no matter what I told her. Even when I slept over her house once and saw her with no makeup, sweatpants and hair tied up and STILL thought she was beautiful... she still wouldn't believe me.

I also have struggled with body image issues my whole life. For a good portion of the years inbetween 5th grade and 11th grade, I was overweight. I was a shut in from 6th-9th grade and for most of last year. Only recently did I lose the weight (due mostly because of my first girlfriend, the aforementioned ex). I was 5'10" 210 pounds at this time last year. Now I'm 160. And now I'm gonna be going off to college, sexing up girls errr'day, and dorming with people. Crazy stuff.

And just so you know I'm not making this stuff up:

8th grade:



9th grade:



11th grade:



And finally, 160 pound me now:

You look way different than I imagined. Congrats though!

Ticia wrote:

DesertFox- wrote:

Whilst perusing Facebook, I noticed one of my friends joined a group/fan thing for which the general message is one of those lame-ass "Tell here she's beautiful" sort of themes. I understand that a LOT of young people of both genders go through a lot of stress with the "ideal body image" issues in adolescence, but do we really need to sugar coat everything and pretend that we treat everyone the same?

What I was thinking is that while everyone may have their own inner beauty and thus be, to an extent, beautiful; there is a large distinction between that and being attractive (which is subjective anyway). Attraction isn't something we can really control and is just the human animal looking to get its freak on.

Thoughts/comments/rants/treatises?

If being attractive is subjective then everyone can be beautiful to someone else.
And attraction a lot of times isn't exactly about looks, have you never met someone you found ugly but wanted to ravish?
Girls have this happen all the time,we meet some weird guy who looks like Jack Black and for some inexplicable reason we can't rest until we have him.

What I was originally remarking upon is how many people consider themselves ugly on the inside, which is really their personal point of view that they can alter, but how if you've got a face that looks like a pigs entrails, you can be a beautiful person, but not attractive.
In regards to your question, though: no. Although I have saw girls I found attractive and then had "What the hell was I thinking moments?" a bit later on; maybe they were two-faces, I don't know.

DesertFox- wrote:

What I was originally remarking upon is how many people consider themselves ugly on the inside, which is really their personal point of view that they can alter, but how if you've got a face that looks like a pigs entrails, you can be a beautiful person, but not attractive.
In regards to your question, though: no. Although I have saw girls I found attractive and then had "What the hell was I thinking moments?" a bit later on; maybe they were two-faces, I don't know.

Some people find pigs attractive so (again) too subjective to even discuss this.

Poseidon wrote:

I tried convincing my ex-girlfriend (who wasn't skinny but really wasn't overly fat either... no flat stomach for sure, but definitely not a chunker) she was beautiful all the time and she just wouldn't believe me no matter what I told her. Even when I slept over her house once and saw her with no makeup, sweatpants and hair tied up and STILL thought she was beautiful... she still wouldn't believe me.

I also have struggled with body image issues my whole life. For a good portion of the years inbetween 5th grade and 11th grade, I was overweight. I was a shut in from 6th-9th grade and for most of last year. Only recently did I lose the weight (due mostly because of my first girlfriend, the aforementioned ex). I was 5'10" 210 pounds at this time last year. Now I'm 160. And now I'm gonna be going off to college, sexing up girls errr'day, and dorming with people. Crazy stuff.

And just so you know I'm not making this stuff up:

8th grade:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v702/ … 280161.jpg

9th grade:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v702/ … ynolan.jpg

11th grade:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v702/ … i/me11.jpg

And finally, 160 pound me now:

http://photos-f.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak … 9610_n.jpg

GJ pos, you look pretty sharp. (no homo, well slight homo i guess)

ive also gotten in shape the past 8 months.

Ticia wrote:

JohnG@lt wrote:

In my experience most women go for the assholes. It might be an American thing but it's almost universally true.

And according to research it entirely depends on what time of the month it is for women when it comes to who they find attractive. Certain parts of the month they favor strong masculine types and at other times they favor the nice guys. It also depends on where they are in life. Younger girls aren't necessarily looking for a lifetime mate and go for the former type. Those looking for a husband go for the latter. It's genetic.

No. Most dumb women go for the assholes.

Ah genetics...the cop out excuse. Next thing you're going to say genetics make a man stray

lrn2biology.

Lai wrote:

Ticia wrote:

JohnG@lt wrote:

It's actually harder for a 10 to get a date than it is for a 6, 7 or 8. Why? Because people won't approach what they feel is out of their league. The 6, 7 or 8 is a safer bet to accept and also not be a headcase or a bitch

BS

This

At least not applying to people in general. I know I always tend to go for girls waaaaaaaaaay out of my league and not just necesarily with regard to looks.

Poor of you who live in a world of leagues. Are you guys still in high school?

Ticia wrote:

Lai wrote:

Ticia wrote:

BS

This

At least not applying to people in general. I know I always tend to go for girls waaaaaaaaaay out of my league and not just necesarily with regard to looks.

Poor of you who live in a world of leagues. Are you guys still in high school?

Poor you who can only see a league as a certain fixed grade in a system rather than a way to describe an abstract sense of "distance".