This post contains many words of a very naughty nature.
If you are too young / sensitive to read them please don't read the post.
This post contains meaning of an ironic nature.
If you are too dumb to understand irony please don't read the post.
This post contains dubious poetry.
If you are sensitive to the missuse of the English language please don't read the post.
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All day a'school, dull as can be,
This learnin' lark is not for me.
Why'd I have to learn this crap,
Spellin', maths an' shit like that?
Not like you need it IRL,
PC's can add an' Word can spell.
An' I don' want a normal job,
The 9't'5, the daily slog.
My career will be so neat,
A cool pro-gamer, uber-133t.
I'll sit at home, play games all day,
Pwn all the nubs and call them gay.
I'll lol at those without the skilz,
Have crazy stats and monster kills.
I'll work on dice's latest hit,
get paid to tell 'em why it's shit.
They should be lis'nin right now too,
I know what's wrong with BF2.
For 1, noob-toobers fuck the game,
Their instant kills are really lame.
'Click-bang', before I know they're there;
Those deaths don't count 'cos they ain't fair.
Those lamers, they should use a knife,
Give me a chance to save my life.
Snipers too, they're all so weak
'Join the fight, you little sneak'
Don't use claymores; they're well unsafe.
Detonate, when I run and strafe.
The worst are rapers of every type.
'Don't just sit there, learn to fight!'
You took our bases, except our main,
Cos it's an uncap. What a shame.
Besieged, surrounded, caught like rats,
And now you shoot us, just for stats.
Please let us out to cap a flag,
So what it's your's? Ya campin' fag.
Why should you have all the fun?
Jus' b'cos my team are dum.
They can't attack let'lone defend,
Don't shoot me please, I'll be yer friend.
We're spawning here to shoot at you.
but it's our main, you CAN'T shoot too.
No fair, you git, you stole our jet.
I didn't see ya, used cheats I bet.
'Hey admin, f'kin ban this 'tard.
His rapin' ways make this game hard!'
I'm swapping teams. I've had enough.
Minus 2, but I don' give a stuff
Autobalance? No! I'm fucking stuck!
Admin, why'd ya make this server suck?
Round ends, just great, look at my stats!
You've fucked the lot you camping twats!
My KDR, my SPM
They look like I'm a noob again.
This server needs some queensbury rules
To protect me from these cheating fools
Ok, I'm gonna win this time,
But first 'say all' to bitch and whine.
Perhaps I'll do my homework, NOT!
I'll play till bedtime, I'm no swat
A gamers life's awaiting me.
I'll be pro. Just wait & see.