Hey everyone,
I've noticed a disturbing trend with myself, and was wondering if anyone else has noticed this?
I was looking at the honored "Best Games of my life" shelf, and as I've been a gamer for a few years, it goes back a bit. When I was looking over it, fighting off waves of nostalgia, I realized that I'd griped about all of them at one point or another. For example:
God damn Blizzard, I earned my Godly Plate of the Whale, and I should be able to keep it just as it is! (Diablo 1)
God damn Blizzard, I wasn't cheating- I was just better than the other guy! (Warcraft 2)
Damn you, Valve! You ruined CS with 1.6!! Steam suxorz my ballz!!!
Fuck EA. BF1942 was fine the way it was. Oooh...Desert Combat...I gotta try this shit! Wait, this is cool. The patches actually make sense! They improve the gameplay.
Holy shit, Counter-Strike: Condition Zero sucks....Valve fucked it up hardcore.
Fuck EA. Punkbuster just screws with BF:Vietnam
Counter-Strike: Source...this looks interesting...Wait! I know! Let's throw on a patch a day in true valve style! Every time, let's make the game a little shittier!
Hey, Battlefield 2! Maybe they fixed all of the bugs! The ranks look challenging...I'll give it a try!
Almost...to...corporal! Wait, what? A patch? Ranks Nerfed? major gameplay issues not fixed?
WAAAHHHHHH!!!!
Why do we continue to set ourselves up for disappointment by going back to the same manufacturers over and over again? We know they release buggy products. We know that the gameplay is never as good post-patch as it is pre-patch. We know the patches will come.
In short, my digerati brothers and sisters, we know that if we go into that club, we'll be drugged, raped, beaten, and quite possibly infected with AIDS. We still go in. We still get excited every time the club re-opens. We always blame the management of the club, and then go to the next club they open.
We, my fellow members of the Nintendo Generation ( and those of you that came of age to Playstation...well, you're okay too. Sorta.), have bought into a false religion.
The church is the computer.
The Bibles are the games.
And we're all in the Choir.
I, your preacher, say that the second coming is at hand! Repent, Oh dabblers in everquest! Repent, those who still play Doom!
The second coming will be... a game without bugs.
The second coming will be... a game without n00bs.
The second coming will be... a game where skill beats glitches
The second coming will be... a game without prohibitive hardware requirements.
The second coming....will never happen. Lets go blow up the people who game on Macs.
-Jade
I've noticed a disturbing trend with myself, and was wondering if anyone else has noticed this?
I was looking at the honored "Best Games of my life" shelf, and as I've been a gamer for a few years, it goes back a bit. When I was looking over it, fighting off waves of nostalgia, I realized that I'd griped about all of them at one point or another. For example:
God damn Blizzard, I earned my Godly Plate of the Whale, and I should be able to keep it just as it is! (Diablo 1)
God damn Blizzard, I wasn't cheating- I was just better than the other guy! (Warcraft 2)
Damn you, Valve! You ruined CS with 1.6!! Steam suxorz my ballz!!!
Fuck EA. BF1942 was fine the way it was. Oooh...Desert Combat...I gotta try this shit! Wait, this is cool. The patches actually make sense! They improve the gameplay.
Holy shit, Counter-Strike: Condition Zero sucks....Valve fucked it up hardcore.
Fuck EA. Punkbuster just screws with BF:Vietnam
Counter-Strike: Source...this looks interesting...Wait! I know! Let's throw on a patch a day in true valve style! Every time, let's make the game a little shittier!
Hey, Battlefield 2! Maybe they fixed all of the bugs! The ranks look challenging...I'll give it a try!
Almost...to...corporal! Wait, what? A patch? Ranks Nerfed? major gameplay issues not fixed?
WAAAHHHHHH!!!!
Why do we continue to set ourselves up for disappointment by going back to the same manufacturers over and over again? We know they release buggy products. We know that the gameplay is never as good post-patch as it is pre-patch. We know the patches will come.
In short, my digerati brothers and sisters, we know that if we go into that club, we'll be drugged, raped, beaten, and quite possibly infected with AIDS. We still go in. We still get excited every time the club re-opens. We always blame the management of the club, and then go to the next club they open.
We, my fellow members of the Nintendo Generation ( and those of you that came of age to Playstation...well, you're okay too. Sorta.), have bought into a false religion.
The church is the computer.
The Bibles are the games.
And we're all in the Choir.
I, your preacher, say that the second coming is at hand! Repent, Oh dabblers in everquest! Repent, those who still play Doom!
The second coming will be... a game without bugs.
The second coming will be... a game without n00bs.
The second coming will be... a game where skill beats glitches
The second coming will be... a game without prohibitive hardware requirements.
The second coming....will never happen. Lets go blow up the people who game on Macs.
-Jade