Love is more choice than feeling, amirite?
Discuss.
Discuss.
Poll
More choice or feeling?
| Choice | 24% | 24% - 8 | ||||
| Feeling | 75% | 75% - 25 | ||||
| Total: 33 | ||||||
It's mostly chemicals.
You've gone through puberty, I'll bet you loved every skirt who looked your way.
You've gone through puberty, I'll bet you loved every skirt who looked your way.
Depends ...
Lustful love is a feeling mixed with hormones, and it prompts you do self-gratifying actions that (in your right mind) you would never do otherwise.
Sacrificial love is a gift from God, and it prompts you do actions for others that you would never do otherwise.
Lustful love is a feeling mixed with hormones, and it prompts you do self-gratifying actions that (in your right mind) you would never do otherwise.
Sacrificial love is a gift from God, and it prompts you do actions for others that you would never do otherwise.
Sexual desire is definitely chemical. I wanted to see most of the girls in junior high and high school naked, but I didn't love them.AussieReaper wrote:
It's mostly chemicals.
You've gone through puberty, I'll bet you loved every skirt who looked your way.
When I first met my wife, I obviously checked her out and liked what I saw.
The spark of attraction prompted me to want to get to know her. While getting to know her as we dated, the desire grew to stay with her and commit only to her. Making the choice to do so is love. Through 7 years of marriage, my wife or I could have made the choice to leave at any time, but we didn't. We chose to stay and work on our relationship through the hard times. If it was just about attraction, I may not have liked her as I got to know her better and decided not to stay.
What you liked was the rush of serotonin your brain was releasing. You then had a chemical dependency state condition in which seeing her increased your blood pressure, anxiety levels and your feelings of attraction came about because of it. You then became hooked on the chemical reaction your brain developed due to see her.Stingray24 wrote:
When I first met my wife, I obviously checked her out and liked what I saw.
So as your brain grew accustomed to this method of seeing her and the resulting chemical joy, you didn't notice her many flaws, or didn't care to. Why would you? Your brain was telling you one thing, but the happy chemicals were saying something else.
Your heart doesn't skip a beat because of a made up fuzzy feeling called love.
As far as marriage goes there is no such thing as true love, there is only, "truely stuck with, because if I divorce her she will steal half of my shit". Ahhhhhh Whuvvvvvvvvve twue Whuvvvvvvvve
lol speaking from experience?lowing wrote:
As far as marriage goes there is no such thing as true love, there is only, "truely stuck with, because if I divorce her she will steal half of my shit". Ahhhhhh Whuvvvvvvvvve twue Whuvvvvvvvve
There was serotonin flooding through my brain when I saw her in those shorts, but it's not the chemical I like.AussieReaper wrote:
What you liked was the rush of serotonin your brain was releasing. You then had a chemical dependency state condition in which seeing her increased your blood pressure, anxiety levels and your feelings of attraction came about because of it. You then became hooked on the chemical reaction your brain developed due to see her.Stingray24 wrote:
When I first met my wife, I obviously checked her out and liked what I saw.
So as your brain grew accustomed to this method of seeing her and the resulting chemical joy, you didn't notice her many flaws, or didn't care to. Why would you? Your brain was telling you one thing, but the happy chemicals were saying something else.
Your heart doesn't skip a beat because of a made up fuzzy feeling called love.
What about when that serotonin isn't buzzing around in my brain and we've just had the biggest fight of our relationship? After all, she said some very hurtful things, I'm not feeling any attraction, and my feelings were telling me to run not walk! Yet I made a choice in spite of my feelings. Why? Love.
No commentdestruktion_6143 wrote:
lol speaking from experience?lowing wrote:
As far as marriage goes there is no such thing as true love, there is only, "truely stuck with, because if I divorce her she will steal half of my shit". Ahhhhhh Whuvvvvvvvvve twue Whuvvvvvvvve
Now it all starts to make sense...lowing wrote:
No commentdestruktion_6143 wrote:
lol speaking from experience?lowing wrote:
As far as marriage goes there is no such thing as true love, there is only, "truely stuck with, because if I divorce her she will steal half of my shit". Ahhhhhh Whuvvvvvvvvve twue Whuvvvvvvvve
Nope, because ya can't afford a divorce, just like the rest of us.Stingray24 wrote:
There was serotonin flooding through my brain when I saw her in those shorts, but it's not the chemical I like.AussieReaper wrote:
What you liked was the rush of serotonin your brain was releasing. You then had a chemical dependency state condition in which seeing her increased your blood pressure, anxiety levels and your feelings of attraction came about because of it. You then became hooked on the chemical reaction your brain developed due to see her.Stingray24 wrote:
When I first met my wife, I obviously checked her out and liked what I saw.
So as your brain grew accustomed to this method of seeing her and the resulting chemical joy, you didn't notice her many flaws, or didn't care to. Why would you? Your brain was telling you one thing, but the happy chemicals were saying something else.
Your heart doesn't skip a beat because of a made up fuzzy feeling called love.
What about when that serotonin isn't buzzing around in my brain and we've just had the biggest fight of our relationship? After all, she said some very hurtful things, I'm not feeling any attraction, and my feelings were telling me to run not walk! Yet I made a choice in spite of my feelings. Why? Love.
I was obsessed with my wife when I was chasing her, now, I wanna go Islam on her more times than not.
Yes, I confess, I am not powerful enough to battle both a conjured up divorce attorney AND a liberal govt. all at the same time. I will need the rest of the Justice League in on that one.Scorpion0x17 wrote:
Now it all starts to make sense...lowing wrote:
No commentdestruktion_6143 wrote:
lol speaking from experience?
The feelings you get are subconscious acting on your feelings are the choice.
Love is just a bunch of chemicals firing off in your brain. I'm off to class when I get back I'll post a bunch if links to articles on love that everyone will ignore and not read.
Love is just a bunch of chemicals firing off in your brain. I'm off to class when I get back I'll post a bunch if links to articles on love that everyone will ignore and not read.
Huh, you want to pray with/to her 5 times a day?lowing wrote:
Nope, because ya can't afford a divorce, just like the rest of us.Stingray24 wrote:
There was serotonin flooding through my brain when I saw her in those shorts, but it's not the chemical I like.AussieReaper wrote:
What you liked was the rush of serotonin your brain was releasing. You then had a chemical dependency state condition in which seeing her increased your blood pressure, anxiety levels and your feelings of attraction came about because of it. You then became hooked on the chemical reaction your brain developed due to see her.
So as your brain grew accustomed to this method of seeing her and the resulting chemical joy, you didn't notice her many flaws, or didn't care to. Why would you? Your brain was telling you one thing, but the happy chemicals were saying something else.
Your heart doesn't skip a beat because of a made up fuzzy feeling called love.
What about when that serotonin isn't buzzing around in my brain and we've just had the biggest fight of our relationship? After all, she said some very hurtful things, I'm not feeling any attraction, and my feelings were telling me to run not walk! Yet I made a choice in spite of my feelings. Why? Love.
I was obsessed with my wife when I was chasing her, now, I wanna go Islam on her more times than not.
Someone needs to watch the new Christopher Titus special on Comedy Central "Love is EVOL!"lowing wrote:
No commentdestruktion_6143 wrote:
lol speaking from experience?lowing wrote:
As far as marriage goes there is no such thing as true love, there is only, "truely stuck with, because if I divorce her she will steal half of my shit". Ahhhhhh Whuvvvvvvvvve twue Whuvvvvvvvve
"If you have never contemplated suicide, then you have never truely been in love. If you have never contemplated murder, then you have never been divorced."
Last edited by imortal (2009-02-17 11:48:44)
We are social animals. Concern and care for others has been a part of our survival.
Xbone Stormsurgezz
This depends on the type of love you're referring to, but even when that is specified, it also depends on the person's willpower.
We all develop feelings for certain people, but whether or not we are led by feeling or choice is ultimately dependent on our rationality.
We all develop feelings for certain people, but whether or not we are led by feeling or choice is ultimately dependent on our rationality.
Starts as a feeling (infatuation). Ends up as a choice (love). A choice that is driven by feeling, but a choice nonetheless.
“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
― Albert Einstein
Doing the popular thing is not always right. Doing the right thing is not always popular
― Albert Einstein
Doing the popular thing is not always right. Doing the right thing is not always popular
The neurons in your brain when you think of her fire to the same paths they are used to, where the paths are strongest. When you first saw her the neurons that fired were telling the hypothalamus to release serotonin which went on to affect every cell in your body. Even though the chemical is not firing when you are arguing, the neurons still fire into the same paths and associations of when you first met, because those paths are the strongest. Each connection between neurons is related to a thought or memory, and because they fire in previous paths stronger, you have the law of associative memory.Stingray24 wrote:
There was serotonin flooding through my brain when I saw her in those shorts, but it's not the chemical I like.AussieReaper wrote:
What you liked was the rush of serotonin your brain was releasing. You then had a chemical dependency state condition in which seeing her increased your blood pressure, anxiety levels and your feelings of attraction came about because of it. You then became hooked on the chemical reaction your brain developed due to see her.Stingray24 wrote:
When I first met my wife, I obviously checked her out and liked what I saw.
So as your brain grew accustomed to this method of seeing her and the resulting chemical joy, you didn't notice her many flaws, or didn't care to. Why would you? Your brain was telling you one thing, but the happy chemicals were saying something else.
Your heart doesn't skip a beat because of a made up fuzzy feeling called love.
What about when that serotonin isn't buzzing around in my brain and we've just had the biggest fight of our relationship? After all, she said some very hurtful things, I'm not feeling any attraction, and my feelings were telling me to run not walk! Yet I made a choice in spite of my feelings. Why? Love.
So your past memories that are triggered at the very thought of her still have the neural net connections linking your synapses to when you felt good. Your neurons may be connected to her though those shorts she wore, the times you've fought but when your around her and your brain is releasing serotonin the majority of your memories when with her are happy. As each neuron is connected in a web, they are more likely to fire towards the more common paths and back to the serotonin memories. You still have the memory of the chemical even subconsciously because your neural net lights up along those same routes.
Because nerve cells that fire together are also soon wired together, your just conditioning your brain to make you "feel" good.
There are different kinds of love.
Lust
Irrational infatuation
Romantic Love
The love which comes from being with someone long term.
They're all chemically based and have their evolutionary use.
Lust
Irrational infatuation
Romantic Love
The love which comes from being with someone long term.
They're all chemically based and have their evolutionary use.
Fuck Israel
Null Vote
It's not as simple as either a choice or a feeling. However I'd pick either 'choice' or 'feeling' over 'chemicals' anyday. I think its something that differs from person to person.
For me personally it has very little to do with chemicals. Its more more of a feeling than a choice as I did fell in love once or twice when I did not want to. On the other hand I might chose to block those feelings or prevent myself from developing them in the first place.
To answer AussieReaper in advance: I have never been in love during puberty, but I had before and I have afterwards.
It's not as simple as either a choice or a feeling. However I'd pick either 'choice' or 'feeling' over 'chemicals' anyday. I think its something that differs from person to person.
For me personally it has very little to do with chemicals. Its more more of a feeling than a choice as I did fell in love once or twice when I did not want to. On the other hand I might chose to block those feelings or prevent myself from developing them in the first place.
To answer AussieReaper in advance: I have never been in love during puberty, but I had before and I have afterwards.
I love my wife, I really do. But sometimes I want to Ike Turner the shit out of her. Falling in love is a feeling, staying in love is a choice. It takes work, patience, mutual respect, sex and unfortunatly saying you are sorry even when it was definetly not your fault. Not even close to being your fault. Not even a little. *sigh*
Malloy must go
"It's more than a feeling, when I hear that old song they used to play;I begin dreaming till I see Mary-anne walk away" -Boston
On that note, out of these options it's a feeling, which is why idiotic middle schoolers think they're in love with their "girlfriends" and "boyfriends"
On that note, out of these options it's a feeling, which is why idiotic middle schoolers think they're in love with their "girlfriends" and "boyfriends"
So true, but a touchy subject that is. There is a huge difference between people feeling (in) love and people thinking they feel (in) love. It is often said that if a feeling is what it is, thinking you love someone means you do. The problem is people don't always know what they feel and consequently draw the wrong conclusions nearly as often.DesertFox- wrote:
which is why idiotic middle schoolers think they're in love with their "girlfriends" and "boyfriends"
An often heard advice/life motto, including of some friends of mine, is 'follow you heart!'. The more I think of it the more assured I become its one of the crappiest advices I have ever heard. If people are in doubt of what they feel (and draw the wrong conclusions), they'd better not accordingly! Its often better to take a breath, rather than to act by the heart. Apart from that it may lead to making a mistake, its will often be selfish as well. In my opinion the world would be a whole better place if people did not do what is in their hearts, but rather did what is right :/
Last edited by Lai (2009-02-18 15:14:34)
I'd say at first it's a choice but as soon as you realize it you feel it.