And if you don't find your car, aliens are involved in the storyline.
Aliens love Reeses Pieces.
If I want to steal thousands of dollars from my company, make sure there's a semi-retarded fat guy that mumbles a lot to cover my tracks.
Playing a piano will keep me out of concentration camps.
All the greatest rock bands in history used the same guitar pick.
Super intelligent aliens will be defeated by a species that uses only 7% of their brain power and can barely solve their own problems.
Aliens that plan for thousands/millions of years to take over Earth, are so incredibly intelligent, but don't realize that Earth's bacteria will kill them.
Zombies can barely walk... humans can run... zombies ALWAYS catch the humans.
Micheal Bay is a horrible fucking director and all his movies are all exactly the same.
If an enormous meteor is going to kill us all, find the most inept drillers in the universe to fly onto it and perform some miracle and destroy it, but first become really gay by telling each other they love each other.
Don't fuck with any man named Maximus.
As long as you rock harder than the devil, he'll pay your rent.
Retards can accomplish 1000% more in their lifetimes than a normal/smart person, and become a millionaire in the process.
The devil loves metal.
If I want to steal thousands of dollars from my company, make sure there's a semi-retarded fat guy that mumbles a lot to cover my tracks.
Playing a piano will keep me out of concentration camps.
All the greatest rock bands in history used the same guitar pick.
Super intelligent aliens will be defeated by a species that uses only 7% of their brain power and can barely solve their own problems.
Aliens that plan for thousands/millions of years to take over Earth, are so incredibly intelligent, but don't realize that Earth's bacteria will kill them.
Zombies can barely walk... humans can run... zombies ALWAYS catch the humans.
Micheal Bay is a horrible fucking director and all his movies are all exactly the same.
If an enormous meteor is going to kill us all, find the most inept drillers in the universe to fly onto it and perform some miracle and destroy it, but first become really gay by telling each other they love each other.
Don't fuck with any man named Maximus.
As long as you rock harder than the devil, he'll pay your rent.
Retards can accomplish 1000% more in their lifetimes than a normal/smart person, and become a millionaire in the process.
The devil loves metal.
Irregardless of the laws of physics, a bus can and will jump over bridge under construction, and everyone will survive.
Remember Me As A Time Of Day
you gotta stick a needle in the guy's chest to let out the air if they have a tension pneumothorax
I thought I was the Last Action Hero ---- apparently I'm not
following the yellow brick road will take where you need to go
you could be fat and nasty but if you have a huge sausage then you can get laid by incredibly hot women
Aliens like to attack on a major federal holiday
following the yellow brick road will take where you need to go
you could be fat and nasty but if you have a huge sausage then you can get laid by incredibly hot women
Aliens like to attack on a major federal holiday
Aliens are all about human height, generally have the same body structure, and usually speak a fluent language.
One more thing to add they are in 90% of the cases evil and are only here to terminate us.The Magic Mullet wrote:
Aliens are all about human height, generally have the same body structure, and usually speak a fluent language.
If a mysterious noise is heard even if it is in a dark corner, YOU always have to check it out.
If your wearing a Silver cross around your neck, it will always stop the bullet in its tracks.
If your wearing a Silver cross around your neck, it will always stop the bullet in its tracks.
Last edited by ShellShock.PwN (2007-04-03 07:23:01)
Super intelligent aliens will be defeated by a species that uses only 7% of their brain power and can barely solve their own problems.
^^ Actually, we use more than 7% of our brain: just about all of it. And you're right, we can't solve our own problems.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_brai … onceptions
Read popular misconceptions.
Back on topic.
Anyone can pilot a plane and land it.
^^ Actually, we use more than 7% of our brain: just about all of it. And you're right, we can't solve our own problems.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_brai … onceptions
Read popular misconceptions.
Back on topic.
Anyone can pilot a plane and land it.
Remember Me As A Time Of Day
If you are thinking about being a high school coach, make sure you include the smallest, goofiest loser who tries out for the team. Keep him on the bench until there's five seconds left and you have to score to win. It'll be an ugly win, but everyone will think you are a genius.
He is Belgian now...Ty wrote:
- Robin Hood was American, (thank you very bloody much Kevin Costner.)
Soap actors are like Looney Tunes characters; you can drop a piano, car, planet on them, they will always come back, it only takes them more episodes.
Evil villains are like Looney Tunes characters; you can put a thousand bullets in them and ran them over with a car, they will always come back, either instantly or in the next movie.
The main character is not like a Looney Tunes character; whatever you trow at them, they are not even affected by it; a Looney Tunes character at least sees birds / bells / stars for a few seconds after being hit.
R
If you wear a hockey mask, you're immortal.
As soon as something goes wrong, even if it's as minor as a pigeon shitting on a police officer, the Feds will come and take over the local police force's operation. The police force will hate this, but as the person in command of the feds say: You will do as i say now. One rogue cop will save the day, regardless of how well equipped the federal forces are.
Remember Me As A Time Of Day
1. Regardless of the contents of a barrel, shooting it will always result in an explosion
2. Binoculars allow us to hear a similar distance to that of which they allow us to see
3. If you are involved in a high speed car chase/race, there is always another gear to reach for.....
2. Binoculars allow us to hear a similar distance to that of which they allow us to see
3. If you are involved in a high speed car chase/race, there is always another gear to reach for.....
Serious Flex
1. Any car can be shot as many times as humanly possible during a high speed chase, but when it stands still and the hero is out, one shot will make it blow up.
2. When a missle hits a building in the middle it will cause explosions on every story at the very same time.
3. Evil people always have the urge to tell their prisoners everything they are doing to destroy the world, including a way to stop it.
4. Detonation timers seem to be in a different reality of time as they run quite slow...
5. Fighter jets can fly a few meters above the ground in the middle of Tokio.
Tiger
2. When a missle hits a building in the middle it will cause explosions on every story at the very same time.
3. Evil people always have the urge to tell their prisoners everything they are doing to destroy the world, including a way to stop it.
4. Detonation timers seem to be in a different reality of time as they run quite slow...
5. Fighter jets can fly a few meters above the ground in the middle of Tokio.
Tiger
Last edited by TigerXtrm (2007-04-03 08:39:49)
- Every roof has a ramp to allow you to jump your car/motorcycle to the adjoining building.
- After a ramp jump, cars are unscathed and perform as good as new.
- You can jump and roll from a fast moving car/train/bus onto hard asphalt and walk away.
- When falling from a tall building, make sure to grab that last flag pool, so you can swing to safety.
- When you are on a helicopter about to crash onto the ground, jump away at the last minute.
- After a ramp jump, cars are unscathed and perform as good as new.
- You can jump and roll from a fast moving car/train/bus onto hard asphalt and walk away.
- When falling from a tall building, make sure to grab that last flag pool, so you can swing to safety.
- When you are on a helicopter about to crash onto the ground, jump away at the last minute.
You can start a raging fire by dropping a cigarette on some petrol
You can bow up a plane that has already taken off, but after you pulled the cap off the fuel tank by lighting the constant stream of kerosene while simultaneously saying "Yippikaye mother fuckers"
You can bow up a plane that has already taken off, but after you pulled the cap off the fuel tank by lighting the constant stream of kerosene while simultaneously saying "Yippikaye mother fuckers"
Last edited by bennisboy (2007-04-03 08:57:11)
It's easier to get to the "Monbar system" if you go by the two star's of "Cathoo", than if you went via the "Jamkay system"... Everyone knows the "Jamkay system" adds 42000000 parsec's on your journey.
Whenever you are getting ready to hook up with your love interest, soft background music will start playing, you will slowly look away from your partner to focus on a train going thru a tunnel, fireworks or Big Ben.
In all SI-FI film's the star system's & planet's all have two syllable names.
The bad guy will never speed up to catch you when they see you get in the elevator and the doors start to close.
Your friends parents are always the coolest people on the planet.
Video games are really a test to see if you are ready to pilot a starfighter in order to be the only ship that can destroy an advancing army of aliens.
Never, EVER set a dove free if aliens do land on this planet.
When you walk into a house and you hear a voice say, "Get out", you should leave.
Your girlfriend's parents don't mind that you climb the tree and enter her bedroom at night.
No capes!
Your friends parents are always the coolest people on the planet.
Video games are really a test to see if you are ready to pilot a starfighter in order to be the only ship that can destroy an advancing army of aliens.
Never, EVER set a dove free if aliens do land on this planet.
When you walk into a house and you hear a voice say, "Get out", you should leave.
Your girlfriend's parents don't mind that you climb the tree and enter her bedroom at night.
No capes!
Whenever the bad guys get knocked out no one ever takes their guns. But they will never wake up in time to pick them up again.
If you get good enough at martial arts, you can fly from rooftop to rooftop, as well as just about floating while fighting.
Remember Me As A Time Of Day
No matter how well you hide, the serial killer will always be able to find you
All couches are bulletproof and can be used as cover in firefight.
