I don't even want to know what kind of crappy porn movies you've been watching to get THAT shot.
ACTUALLY:Mariena wrote:
Strangely arousing, according to some?
Seriously, Fancy. You never fooled any of us because this story is waaay too gross to be believable.
Okay, of course this did not happen to Fancy. BUT. Don't say it's too gross to be believable. This is from my ex girlfriend, true story, here we go:
So, this dude is sleeping over at his girlfriend. She's asleep. He, for some reason I cannot grasp, thinks it is a good idea to try and fart in her face. You guys feel it coming, right?
So, he pulls down his pants, balances over her pretty sleeping face, and lets it rip.
Unfortunately he had diarrhea. In her face. She, of course, woke up and dumped his ass on the spot.
Imagine having to explain to your friends why you broke up:
"Yo, dude, how's your girl?"
-"We broke up."
"What? Why?"
-"I took a dump in her face"
*Awkward silence*
So, Fancy, there you have it. Your fake story is pwnd by my real one.
Mind you, this happened to a friend of my ex-girlfriend. She told me about it when I told her about a guy I knew that took a dump in his sleeping bag. But that is for another day.
In conclusion, the replies to Fancy's threads are usually much more amusing than Fancy's first post. Just see Toilet Sex's reply above!
"If you want a vision of the future, imagine SecuROM slapping your face with its dick -- forever." -George Orwell
LOL!!! Wow... fucking hilarious shit... (no pun intended)
lolbuLLet_t00th wrote:
Dont worry its happened to all of us........
......Nottttt (in the best Borat accent ever)
You should of picked up your poop and threw it on her friends, since it was the last time you're gonna see her anyway. haha!
i say give her choco lax and see how she likes it
All I can say is ROFL.
I don't care if that's true of not its damn funny.
I don't care if that's true of not its damn funny.
Reminds me of the time I was taking a shower, bent over to clean my toes, lost my balance fell a step or to back right into the water adjustment nknob. Now, on my shower, a good temperature is about 9 o'clock on the knob.
Now, when my ass hit the nozzle the handle on the end aligned with my ass crack 12 o'clock sharp, the freezing cold temperature. Now there I was, with a water handle sticking in my ass and freezing water splashing on me.
Naturally, the cold water made my muscles tighten and me jump from the shock of the cold, the handle broke off in my ass crack and imbedded into the flesh in my ass. I was in no mood to sit in a car and drive with this thing stuck into my ass cheek, so my friend drove me after I called him and had difficulty explaining to him and he taking me seriously.
So, there we were in the car.....im laying on the back seat of the car with my ass cheek bleeding and my friend , to make matters worse, is a guy, was helping me out of the car. Now, Try to explain that to hospital doctors. They won't believe you, and they'll think you're gay.
Now, when my ass hit the nozzle the handle on the end aligned with my ass crack 12 o'clock sharp, the freezing cold temperature. Now there I was, with a water handle sticking in my ass and freezing water splashing on me.
Naturally, the cold water made my muscles tighten and me jump from the shock of the cold, the handle broke off in my ass crack and imbedded into the flesh in my ass. I was in no mood to sit in a car and drive with this thing stuck into my ass cheek, so my friend drove me after I called him and had difficulty explaining to him and he taking me seriously.
So, there we were in the car.....im laying on the back seat of the car with my ass cheek bleeding and my friend , to make matters worse, is a guy, was helping me out of the car. Now, Try to explain that to hospital doctors. They won't believe you, and they'll think you're gay.
Oh my god that was the funniest thing i've ever heard
I've heard of a golden shower, but never in my life have i heard of a fart shower LmAO [I think i just craped myself] Dude how old is your chick anyhow? If things like that freak her out now, then she still has allot to learn, and she will probably stay single or unmarried her whole life. [NICE STORY BUY THE WAY]
Lmfao... +1RoosterCantrell wrote:
Now there I was, with a water handle sticking in my ass and freezing water splashing on me.
Google images, scat porn.acidkiller187 wrote:
I've heard of a golden shower, but never in my life have i heard of a fart shower
♥
Best out-of-context-quote ever. I copy paste this to everyone currently online in my msn list. Good times.Toilet Sex wrote:
Plus I can ALWAYS feel poo coming out, it never just slips out. For me at least. And my anus is tight so it doesn't fall out without any warning.
"If you want a vision of the future, imagine SecuROM slapping your face with its dick -- forever." -George Orwell
Here I sit all broken hearted.
Tried to shit but only farted.
So I thought I'd take a chance,
Tried to fart, but shit my pants.
And then she left me... lmao!
Tried to shit but only farted.
So I thought I'd take a chance,
Tried to fart, but shit my pants.
And then she left me... lmao!
Sober enough to know what I'm doing, drunk enough to really enjoy doing it
Haha Spreading the toilet love?LaidBackNinja wrote:
Best out-of-context-quote ever. I copy paste this to everyone currently online in my msn list. Good times.Toilet Sex wrote:
Plus I can ALWAYS feel poo coming out, it never just slips out. For me at least. And my anus is tight so it doesn't fall out without any warning.
♥
Never should a story contain that sentence, alas, one does....Toilet Sex wrote:
Lmfao... +1RoosterCantrell wrote:
Now there I was, with a water handle sticking in my ass and freezing water splashing on me.
I bet all of the people in the dorm know now what you did lol
Fancy hasn't done it yet so I guess I will
I always thought those were 10-year old boys. Silly me.Mariena wrote:
Goddamn women. Always ruining everything. Stealing your kills, leeching XP in parties, kill teammates and NEVER heal or revive you!
Pssh.
Fancy, nice story. I want to know your source though. I've seen a few of these before, including this one. Too bad they're probably all fake, even from your source.
lmao read the first post, then re-read the title
lmao dumped.
lmao dumped.
whhhhy......????????cablecopulate wrote:
You make the best topics ever.
ps: post pics of her.
at least it dident happen when u were, ruffling the sheets eh!!!
ROFL your simple amazing, was it worth it?
Well If she was the "ONE" then she would have understood.....If she comes back then its meant to be.
goodluck
I guess I ruin intimate moments too though. Chicks don't understand us guys. we're too simple
goodluck
I guess I ruin intimate moments too though. Chicks don't understand us guys. we're too simple