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Poll

Would you consider/have engaged in premarital sex?

Yes, already been there and done that.66%66% - 209
Yes, I will if I get the chance to/grow up.18%18% - 59
Undecided, need to learn more.5%5% - 17
Definitely not, it's wrong.9%9% - 29
Total: 314
2006-10-10 18:12:39
twiistaaa
Member
+87|6925|mexico
why would you hope and wait to find that special person knowing you might die any minute? take the pussy option now.

and i dont think you can actually say you dont want sex or you only want it after marriage unless it is actually on offer to you. otherwise your just kidding yourself. its not really a choice if theres no option for it.

go out, have sex, enjoy life and learn from your mistakes. dont sit around and form an opinion on something when the something doesnt even exist in your life.
2006-10-10 18:45:30
OuTLaW667
Member
+2|6685
The question started 'Would you consider'............

Now, regardless of your religious, moral or any other beliefs, when a HORNY chick makes it obvious

she wants to get busy with u, then the very LEAST your gonna do is CONSIDER IT

So for the ppl that voted 'Definately not, it's wrong'........... WHO U TRYIN' TO KID?? lol

Seriously tho...each to their own IMO.
2006-10-10 19:25:27
jonsimon
Member
+224|6752

IRONCHEF wrote:

Well, 95% of the world's historical population would disagree with that assessment, and sex IS up to the participants.
More than 95% of the world's historical population was illiterate, too.
2006-10-10 20:22:46
Pug
UR father's brother's nephew's former roommate
+652|6799|Texas - Bigger than France

Cougar wrote:

Someday, most of you will come to the realization and conclusion that you will never get to have sex.  Ever. 

That's the day you will stop caring about your stats.
Is pre-martial stats wrong?
2006-10-10 20:54:55
Poseidon
Fudgepack DeQueef
+3,253|6795|Long Island, New York
I thought sex was a SIN? Not sacred. Well I wouldn't know anyways, I'm an atheist jew now anyways

And yes. I'd definately partake in it. One of the reasons why i'm now an atheist is because I'm not letting any morals stop me from living life to it's fullest.
2006-10-10 23:12:17
Vub
The Power of Two
+188|6751|Sydney, Australia
Certainly to some people having sex whenever you want it, kinda like buying take away, means living life to the fullest. Barring pre-marital sex with your fiance, going to a bar to pick up is like sleeping with a prostitute, except it'll cost you less financially. So does living life to the fullest also include buying prostitutes?

Some people have premarital sex because they're insecure, others because they have an inferiority complex and they're trying to disprove it, while the majority is probably out of curiosity. But refraining from having sex before marriage doesn't mean you won't have sex at all in your life, it'll just mean sex isn't cheap and stale for you when you get married.

I would be uncomfortable marrying a girl who's no longer a virgin, but that's just me. I'm sure others feel the same way, and because of it, I'd choose not to have pre-marital sex either. The time spent looking could be spent on other things that are more pressing, like building a career, or getting a better education, which will reward you far more in your life than scoring before you are married.
2006-10-11 05:48:51
PRINCESS
the evil is pure
+23|6795|scotland
as i said before i have been with the same guy for 10 years and i have been a bit silly and fooled around twice in the whole 10 years(1 time we were on a break). he has forgiven me and we have talked about it, the one thing he has said to me which will always stick in my head is that quote"i was pure when he met me and now i'm not" and this is what hurts him the most.

i have totally regerted what i did and if i could turn back time i would change every thing, and even tho i have done this we are planning to get married next year.
2006-10-11 06:03:28
CameronPoe
Member
+2,925|6812

Vub wrote:

Certainly to some people having sex whenever you want it, kinda like buying take away, means living life to the fullest. Barring pre-marital sex with your fiance, going to a bar to pick up is like sleeping with a prostitute, except it'll cost you less financially. So does living life to the fullest also include buying prostitutes?
LOL. Women in bars are like prostitutes because prositutes are sexually attracted to those that they sleep with? LOL. You make women sound like robots that play no part in the entire process whatsoever. Sheesh. Is this a Saudi Arabian forum? It's a TWO-WAY THING. You don't hit them over the head with a club and drag them to your cave. Two consenting adults?

Vub wrote:

Some people have premarital sex because they're insecure, others because they have an inferiority complex and they're trying to disprove it, while the majority is probably out of curiosity.
You forgot one important category of people: people who have sex because it is highly enjoyable. Jesus H. Christ....

Vub wrote:

I would be uncomfortable marrying a girl who's no longer a virgin, but that's just me. I'm sure others feel the same way, and because of it, I'd choose not to have pre-marital sex either. The time spent looking could be spent on other things that are more pressing, like building a career, or getting a better education, which will reward you far more in your life than scoring before you are married.
Or better still: build your life, education, career, etc. AND have sex!!!! Everybody wins....

Last edited by CameronPoe (2006-10-11 06:04:48)

2006-10-11 06:07:54
unnamednewbie13
Moderator
+2,053|7029|PNW

CameronPoe wrote:

Vub wrote:

Certainly to some people having sex whenever you want it, kinda like buying take away, means living life to the fullest. Barring pre-marital sex with your fiance, going to a bar to pick up is like sleeping with a prostitute, except it'll cost you less financially. So does living life to the fullest also include buying prostitutes?
LOL. Women in bars are like prostitutes because prositutes are sexually attracted to those that they sleep with? LOL. You make women sound like robots that play no part in the entire process whatsoever. Sheesh. Is this a Saudi Arabian forum? It's a TWO-WAY THING. You don't hit them over the head with a club and drag them to your cave. Two consenting adults?
I hesitate to forward this notion, but nowhere in that statement did he stipulate female when speaking of prostitutes. In fact, fiance is technically a term reserved for 'groom-to-be,' though often erroneously used for both parties.

Or was there something before all this that i missed?

Last edited by unnamednewbie13 (2006-10-11 06:08:39)

2006-10-11 06:19:27
CameronPoe
Member
+2,925|6812
Point taken. My main problem though is that prositution is unnatural whereas sexual attraction leading to sex between two consenting adults is natural and Vub appears to be misguidedly equating the two.

Last edited by CameronPoe (2006-10-11 06:21:57)

2006-10-11 06:22:49
unnamednewbie13
Moderator
+2,053|7029|PNW

CameronPoe wrote:

Point taken. My main problem though is that prositution is unnatural whereas sexual attraction leading to sex between two consenting adults is natural and Vub appears to be misguidedly equating the two.
I'm not going to draw a comparison between the following and sexual urges, but I'd like to issue another point:

Violent urges are natural, but that doesn't necessarily mean that it is good for civilized society to outright engage in murderous anarchy with abandon.

(and with that, signing off)

Last edited by unnamednewbie13 (2006-10-11 06:23:51)

2006-10-11 06:58:47
Vub
The Power of Two
+188|6751|Sydney, Australia
Just saying it's the 21st century doesn't prove to me why you would choose to have pre-marital sex, unless you are an unimaginative conformist. I think CameronPoe is an idealist, and makes it all seem easy and natural. However, I wish to hear your views on the growing number of people with STDs. Marriage is like a method of quarantine, because you don't spread your STD to more than one person. But "freedom of sex" is attributed to the growing STD problem in the world. We need to consider that before making our choice.

OK, sorry, that sounded incoherent.

My conclusion: people who choose premarital sex choose it based mainly on physical reasons, while those choosing not to do it (the 21 of us ) choose it based mainly on spiritual reasons.
2006-10-11 07:12:37
CameronPoe
Member
+2,925|6812

Vub wrote:

Just saying it's the 21st century doesn't prove to me why you would choose to have pre-marital sex, unless you are an unimaginative conformist. I think CameronPoe is an idealist, and makes it all seem easy and natural. However, I wish to hear your views on the growing number of people with STDs. Marriage is like a method of quarantine, because you don't spread your STD to more than one person. But "freedom of sex" is attributed to the growing STD problem in the world. We need to consider that before making our choice.

OK, sorry, that sounded incoherent.

My conclusion: people who choose premarital sex choose it based mainly on physical reasons, while those choosing not to do it (the 21 of us ) choose it based mainly on spiritual reasons.
I fear you are being a little too idealistic yourself. The total percentage of people who 'save themselves' until marriage in the western world must be absolutely miniscule. Maybe Vub sees something more special in marriage than me but as an atheist I view it as a legal agreement and a statement of commitment not some mystical or spiritual bond. Religion is becoming less compatible with the modern world with every passing day, as are the concepts of which Vub speaks (which are counter to natural human instincts). Suppression of human instinct is generally unhealthy (save for the example unnamednewbie gave). STDs are contracted by stupid and careless people, those who take intraveinous drugs and those unfortunates who contract them through a bad blood transfusion or whatever. I'm sorry Vub but your preaching to masses that have long since been converted to a far freer less restrictive and more progressive way of thinking.

PS An ex of mine offered to and had a STD test performed at a clinic, of her own volition, prior to us beginning to have sex. As such, I was certain that there was no danger of me catching an STD. Modern science eh? Fantastic.

Last edited by CameronPoe (2006-10-11 07:14:06)

2006-10-11 07:18:22
topal63
. . .
+533|6975

unnamednewbie13 wrote:

CameronPoe wrote:

Point taken. My main problem though is that prostitution is unnatural whereas sexual attraction leading to sex between two consenting adults is natural and Vub appears to be misguidedly equating the two.
I'm not going to draw a comparison between the following and sexual urges, but I'd like to issue another point:

Violent urges are natural, but that doesn't necessarily mean that it is good for civilized society to outright engage in murderous anarchy with abandon.

(and with that, signing off)
And as far as prostitution being un-natural, BULLSHIT, whats natural got to do with it? NOTHING, it's a matter of economics; they want ONE thing money; well actually since the need for money equates to the need for sustenance which keeps a roof over your head and food on the table; their fucking you based upon their NATURAL will to SURVIVE. ANYWAYS...

People always over simply everything.

Like aggressive urges
Like sexual urges,
Their is a thing called BALANCE and this FACT: humans are social animals NATURALLY. Whilst the human animal is a predator - we are akin to this type - but predatory mammals are mostly: social - NATURALLY. They raise and take care of their own, they bond with their kind, they work together to survive. This natural desire to not be ALONE, to work TOGETHER, the feeling that ACTIONS have consequences, all these (and other) social traits are for the most part NATURALLY occurring; and then enhanced by nurturing/learning.

We are social by nature, not anarchists.

Your right on point on this Cameron - sex is between to mature, natural people - who posses mutual attraction. It is definitely a two-way thing.
2006-10-11 09:15:02
IRONCHEF
Member
+385|6748|Northern California

Poseidon wrote:

I thought sex was a SIN? Not sacred. Well I wouldn't know anyways, I'm an atheist jew now anyways

And yes. I'd definately partake in it. One of the reasons why i'm now an atheist is because I'm not letting any morals stop me from living life to it's fullest.
I'd like to point out that the majority of people (my guess) in modern society probably think this way.  "Eat, Drink, Be merry for tomorrow we may die!"  Someone also said (cameron i think) that religion is slipping further and further away from what the world mandates.  This is also true, and we religious people realize it and saw it coming (thanks to ancient prophetic writings saying it would be this way).

So what then should happen?  Should religious people, who understand life better than those who aren't religious just give in and go along with the world on it's reckless pursuit of gluttony, anarchy, and ignorant bliss?  NO.  That's what makes us religious.

More importantly, on Poseidon's remark to live life to the fullest by indulging...I would like to reverse that and add a question, "How do you know that abstinence, if practiced and understood would not allow you to live life to the fullest?"  We practice abstinence (some of us) from pre-marital sex because in doing so we become masters of ourselves (as opposed to lathargic, gluttonous, and out of control) which gives satisfaction like nothing else can.  Acheiving a difficult goal, especially a spiritul one, brings huge benefits and blessings..even blessings undescribable that easily counter the effects of having 'lived life to the fullest' by engaging in pre-marital sex.

I don't drink alcohol, smoke, drink coffee, do harmful drugs, have extra-marital affairs, break laws, I try to hold my tongue in anger, and I avoid a host of other things that the world says is ok.  Guess what?  I'm living a much richer, more blessed, more happy life than I was before I started that 15 years ago.  I can say without a doubt that because of my sacrifices, my blessings far outweigh what I'd experience without the sacrifices.  And as added benefits, i'm not a wife beater, womanizer, child molester, criminal, drunk, STD carrier/passer, addict to a thousand different things, and probably other things.  Granted these are extremes...they are still not possible to me because i'm in control of myself.  And if you call that oppression, you're sorely mistaken.  Control is not oppression, unless it's a negative effect.
2006-10-11 10:49:32
James-m
Member
+28|6806|England

Vub wrote:

By its definition, fornication means sex outside of marriage, which can be understood as sex when you're not married. To a Christian, premarital sex is not allowed because sex is sacred, but to some non-Christians, premarital sex is unethical.

From reading certain posts on this forum, it seems like the ritual of going to a bar, meeting someone and then having a one night stand, after which the two people would once again become strangers is a club of which some people are members. From this I gather it is quite common in the different parts of the world (mostly advanced nations and the newly industrialised nations) for this to occur, and people no longer look at it in disdain. Perhaps a shift of the social paradigm had occurred some time over the past 20 years led by American popular culture to have warranted this previously prohibited display of salaciousness.

I would like to pose this question to the BF2s community: Would you have pre-marital sex? If yes, what do you feel about it? If not, what do you think stops you from doing it?
i believe you need to get out more...
2006-10-11 10:58:54
IRONCHEF
Member
+385|6748|Northern California
james,

the point of this forum is for serious debate and talk.  if you can't abide, please show  yourself the way out.
2006-10-11 11:16:01
Bertster7
Confused Pothead
+1,101|6838|SE London

unnamednewbie13 wrote:

CameronPoe wrote:

Point taken. My main problem though is that prositution is unnatural whereas sexual attraction leading to sex between two consenting adults is natural and Vub appears to be misguidedly equating the two.
I'm not going to draw a comparison between the following and sexual urges, but I'd like to issue another point:

Violent urges are natural, but that doesn't necessarily mean that it is good for civilized society to outright engage in murderous anarchy with abandon.
Acting on violent urges hurts other people. Acting on sexual urges doesn't necessarily hurt anyone, it could do if you were to go out and rape someone, but that's not what is under discussion. Sex between two consenting adults is no ones business but their own and doesn't harm anyone - in fact two people get to have a good time.

James-m wrote:

Vub wrote:

By its definition, fornication means sex outside of marriage, which can be understood as sex when you're not married. To a Christian, premarital sex is not allowed because sex is sacred, but to some non-Christians, premarital sex is unethical.

I would like to pose this question to the BF2s community: Would you have pre-marital sex? If yes, what do you feel about it? If not, what do you think stops you from doing it?
i believe you need to get out more...
I agree.

IRONCHEF wrote:

james,

the point of this forum is for serious debate and talk.  if you can't abide, please show  yourself the way out.
Leave him alone, he made a perfectly valid point.
2006-10-11 11:20:14
sergeriver
Cowboy from Hell
+1,928|7014|Argentina

Vub wrote:

I wish to hear your views on the growing number of people with STDs. Marriage is like a method of quarantine, because you don't spread your STD to more than one person. But "freedom of sex" is attributed to the growing STD problem in the world. We need to consider that before making our choice.
I thought it was only a matter of giving your virtue to your wife, not a quarantine method.  So, in the Bible says don't fuck before you get married or you'll get aids?
2006-10-11 11:55:58
Ilocano
buuuurrrrrrppppp.......
+341|6924

http://www.libchrist.com/bible/DavdSolomon.html

David and Solomon, to name but two such major Old Testament figures, had many wives and concubines. As did a great many other "great men of the bible" who were men of God. It was just normal and accepted.

Concubinage was a legally sanctioned and socially acceptable practice in ancient cultures, including that of the Hebrews; concubines, however, were denied the protection to which a legal wives was entitled. . . . . the concubine's status was inferior to that of a legal wife. Her children had certain rights, including support by the father and legitimacy in the event of the marriage of the parents

David, Solomon and many other biblical men who had many wives and concubines worshiped the the one, true God, and their having wives and concubines was never stated as being anything sinful in the Bible.

...

Even Abraham gave his wife, Sarah, up to have sex with another kings 2 different times that was not sin, But God stepped in and used it to help Abraham gain more wealth. Abraham sold his wife to these kings. What was bad about it was it was permanent sale. God stepped in to reverse the permanent sale part of it and Abraham got to keep the things and got his wife back on top of it. 2 different times this same thing happen. Both times God blessed them for it.

(The New Living Translation ) 2 Samuel 12:8 I (God) gave you his (Saul's) house and his wives and the kingdoms of Israel and Judah. And if that had not been enough, I would have given you much, much more.

Solomon’s problem was he supported his wives and concubine in helping them worship their gods. He wanted to make them happy. Instead he should have told them that there is only one God and He alone is who we will worship. Sex was not the sin. But the sex must have been so good that he wanted to make his women happy also, so he gave in to the women.

There was no sin in asking the Good Lord for some good women to have good sex with, just don't steal another man's wife. Ask first.


2006-10-11 12:02:09
EricTViking
Yes, I am Queeg
+48|6809|UK
Consider it? Nah, I'd just get on with it.
2006-10-11 12:07:31
IRONCHEF
Member
+385|6748|Northern California
wow, you really know what you're talking about don't you....

But unlike certain trolls, i'll explain the error of your thinking.

yes, Abraham, Solomon (not david), and a few other jewish prophets and kings practiced plural marriage.  There are also, in history, those who mimicked this god-given commandment by satisfying their own sexual desires by having concubines and whoredoms.  There's a very, very big difference between the two practices.  And no, Abraham didn't give up his wife.  According to how the practice is done, Abraham would have had his wife pick his husband's handmades (who he would then legally marry, house, and support).  Abraham treated each of his handmades (wives) equally and righteously.  But this topic is not very well understood by non-religious people (hardly even among religious people) so I'll stop here.  The facts being that it was practiced by commandment from God, and also by choice by those wanting it.  And honestly, who wouldn't want it..in the form of having many sex partners?  But when you look at it as treating each of those wives equally with all the love, effort, and sustanence you would provide righteously to one wife..then it takes a whole new light.
2006-10-11 12:28:22
Poseidon
Fudgepack DeQueef
+3,253|6795|Long Island, New York

IRONCHEF wrote:

I'd like to point out that the majority of people (my guess) in modern society probably think this way.  "Eat, Drink, Be merry for tomorrow we may die!"  Someone also said (cameron i think) that religion is slipping further and further away from what the world mandates.  This is also true, and we religious people realize it and saw it coming (thanks to ancient prophetic writings saying it would be this way).
Probably because people are realizing things and thinking for themselves, not letting a 2000 year old book rule them and tell them what to do. Just as people did once the Egyptian religious system became pretty much out of order, so to say.

So what then should happen?  Should religious people, who understand life better than those who aren't religious just give in and go along with the world on it's reckless pursuit of gluttony, anarchy, and ignorant bliss?  NO.  That's what makes us religious.
LOL, you guys understand life better than us? Oh yeah, we don't believe in god, so we know NOTHING about life and have no morals!

More importantly, on Poseidon's remark to live life to the fullest by indulging...I would like to reverse that and add a question, "How do you know that abstinence, if practiced and understood would not allow you to live life to the fullest?"  We practice abstinence (some of us) from pre-marital sex because in doing so we become masters of ourselves (as opposed to lathargic, gluttonous, and out of control) which gives satisfaction like nothing else can.  Acheiving a difficult goal, especially a spiritul one, brings huge benefits and blessings..even blessings undescribable that easily counter the effects of having 'lived life to the fullest' by engaging in pre-marital sex.
I'm not saying if you practice absintence you won't live life at all, just as if you don't go skydiving or something you can still live life, but by partaking in pre-marital sex, people live life to the fullest without anything holding them back. It's a bit difficult to explain.

I've had pre-marital sex and I'm not out of control, in fact my grades are higher than ever and I'm doing quite well in life.

I don't drink alcohol, smoke, drink coffee, do harmful drugs, have extra-marital affairs, break laws, I try to hold my tongue in anger, and I avoid a host of other things that the world says is ok.  Guess what?  I'm living a much richer, more blessed, more happy life than I was before I started that 15 years ago.  I can say without a doubt that because of my sacrifices, my blessings far outweigh what I'd experience without the sacrifices.  And as added benefits, i'm not a wife beater, womanizer, child molester, criminal, drunk, STD carrier/passer, addict to a thousand different things, and probably other things.  Granted these are extremes...they are still not possible to me because i'm in control of myself.  And if you call that oppression, you're sorely mistaken.  Control is not oppression, unless it's a negative effect.
I don't do any of the above either, but I'm still living my life to the fullest extent because I'm not letting a 2000 year old book tell me what to do. I do what the country's laws tell me, because those are NOT optional. You follow them or your face the consequences.

Even though I don't do any of those, I have MANY family friends who: Drink, smoke, drink coffee and everything and are VERY VERY SUCCESSFUL. One owns a Toyota Car Dealership and is a Multi-Millionaire.

Just because we partake in pre-marital sex doesn't mean we're out of control or have no morals, it means we enjoy ourselves.
2006-10-11 12:30:39
Ilocano
buuuurrrrrrppppp.......
+341|6924

IRONCHEF wrote:

wow, you really know what you're talking about don't you....

But unlike certain trolls, i'll explain the error of your thinking.

yes, Abraham, Solomon (not david), and a few other jewish prophets and kings practiced plural marriage.  There are also, in history, those who mimicked this god-given commandment by satisfying their own sexual desires by having concubines and whoredoms.  There's a very, very big difference between the two practices.  And no, Abraham didn't give up his wife.  According to how the practice is done, Abraham would have had his wife pick his husband's handmades (who he would then legally marry, house, and support).  Abraham treated each of his handmades (wives) equally and righteously.  But this topic is not very well understood by non-religious people (hardly even among religious people) so I'll stop here.  The facts being that it was practiced by commandment from God, and also by choice by those wanting it.  And honestly, who wouldn't want it..in the form of having many sex partners?  But when you look at it as treating each of those wives equally with all the love, effort, and sustanence you would provide righteously to one wife..then it takes a whole new light.
Easy... notice the at the end?  Just quoting something I found amusing on the web.  Not my own words...

But in your own words, polygamy, if done right, is ok?
2006-10-11 12:34:29
Poseidon
Fudgepack DeQueef
+3,253|6795|Long Island, New York
lol this topic's great so far, in topics like these I always hear stuff like "since he doesn't believe in god he has no morals".

They're called laws.

Last edited by Poseidon (2006-10-11 12:34:50)

 

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