Yes but that's still 300 words without you managing to tell any of us what you're trying to say.
The paradox is only a conflict between reality and your feeling what reality ought to be.
~ Richard Feynman
~ Richard Feynman
It's not supposed to tell you what I'm trying to say either. I wouldn't expect a three hundred word excerpt from the middle of the paper to do that. I just thought it might exhibit some measure of original thought, as I was castigated earlier for not aspiring to.
Post the conclusion and we'll be able to tell you; posting a random paragraph where you comment on both sides doesn't tell us what you think.
But how is it original thought when you haven't actually said anything? I don't do humanities but I'm pretty sure that an original thought has to be more original than "there are a variety of opinions on this topic with their own merits", which is basically all you say.nukchebi0 wrote:
It's not supposed to tell you what I'm trying to say either. I wouldn't expect a three hundred word excerpt from the middle of the paper to do that. I just thought it might exhibit some measure of original thought, as I was castigated earlier for not aspiring to.
EDIT: Oh, and you do say that you have to consider all the various opinions critically before coming up with your own. Great - but you still haven't told me anything about what you're trying to say. I mean I realise that two paragraph taken out of context won't make much sense but as far as I can tell you're not saying anything useful at all there.
EDIT2: I know that it's been said but part of the problem is that you are being needlessly verbose. There is no need to spend 300 words saying what you say. It's just wasteful.
Last edited by Spark (2010-03-31 03:48:24)
The paradox is only a conflict between reality and your feeling what reality ought to be.
~ Richard Feynman
~ Richard Feynman
Why am I at a second rate UK university when apparently I could easily keep up with Yale essay writing?
because standards in american universities, at undergraduate level, are apparently much lower
nuk's writing style would also get laughed out of any top-tier english/arts department in the UK
nuk's writing style would also get laughed out of any top-tier english/arts department in the UK
libertarian benefit collector - anti-academic super-intellectual. http://mixlr.com/the-little-phrase/
The Norwegian government doesn't even hand out scholarships for the first year of US universities, while you get up to £8k if you study in the UK/elsewhere.
Hm yeah, it actually makes sense as I delve further. I guess I was looking at it knowing how its integrated into the paper. W/e.
Edit: A sample of your own accepted work would back up the claim, as an obvious note.
Please enlighten me on how to compose prose in a manner appealing to the most erudite academics in the UK.Uzique wrote:
because standards in american universities, at undergraduate level, are apparently much lower
nuk's writing style would also get laughed out of any top-tier english/arts department in the UK
First drafts are not really representative of the final product, obviously, and on top of this, it's a hastily drafted, sleep-deprived, effort. Not really some of my best work when it comes to sentence composition and the like. With that said, the writing education here in America probably isn't as good as that in Britain. I hate conceding this, but our secondary system really sucks.ghettoperson wrote:
Why am I at a second rate UK university when apparently I could easily keep up with Yale essay writing?
Edit: A sample of your own accepted work would back up the claim, as an obvious note.
Last edited by nukchebi0 (2010-03-31 03:55:21)
i know a few HS seniors who take itghettoperson wrote:
Hey question American students, do you guys all pop Adderall constantly like Textsfromlastnight makes it sound? It sounds awesomely helpful, it's too bad it's illegal over here.
"people in ny have a general idea of how to drive. one of the pedals goes forward the other one prevents you from dying"
No, Nuk's excerpt is just complete shit from Ivy level paper.Uzique wrote:
because standards in american universities, at undergraduate level, are apparently much lower
nuk's writing style would also get laughed out of any top-tier english/arts department in the UK
Wait, what?Cybargs wrote:
No, Nuk's excerpt is just complete shit from Ivy level paper.Uzique wrote:
because standards in american universities, at undergraduate level, are apparently much lower
nuk's writing style would also get laughed out of any top-tier english/arts department in the UK
Last edited by nukchebi0 (2010-03-31 04:21:32)
circumlocution
uk english departments don't buy grandiose verbosity in place of actual content and thought. nuk's seems to be an exercise of sitting on the fence and avoiding the manner with pretty words and unnecessary phrasings. get to the point, or at least make one. academically speaking, every paragraph in an essay should make a point- otherwise what's it there for? filler material? at ivy-league level? oh dear.
i prefer the writing of raymond carver to charles dickens. say something to me instead of trying to impress me with a vocabulary i had already back-indexed at age 15.
uk english departments don't buy grandiose verbosity in place of actual content and thought. nuk's seems to be an exercise of sitting on the fence and avoiding the manner with pretty words and unnecessary phrasings. get to the point, or at least make one. academically speaking, every paragraph in an essay should make a point- otherwise what's it there for? filler material? at ivy-league level? oh dear.
i prefer the writing of raymond carver to charles dickens. say something to me instead of trying to impress me with a vocabulary i had already back-indexed at age 15.
libertarian benefit collector - anti-academic super-intellectual. http://mixlr.com/the-little-phrase/
The sitting on the fence is part of my analysis of the debate over nuclear abolition. It's not intended to be sitting on the fence per se, but rather an attempt to describe the nature of the debate. I'm not exclusively forming an argument in the debate, as that wasn't the intended purpose of the paper. The vocabulary was duly noted, though it wasn't intentionally done.Uzique wrote:
circumlocution
uk english departments don't buy grandiose verbosity in place of actual content and thought. nuk's seems to be an exercise of sitting on the fence and avoiding the manner with pretty words and unnecessary phrasings. get to the point, or at least make one. academically speaking, every paragraph in an essay should make a point- otherwise what's it there for? filler material? at ivy-league level? oh dear.
i prefer the writing of raymond carver to charles dickens. say something to me instead of trying to impress me with a vocabulary i had already back-indexed at age 15.
That was the same thing I thought. It seemed to try to trick people into believing it was work worth reading by using needlessly flowery language rather than just making a decent point.
It made a point, but it's not one apparent without the rest of paper. The writing style, while flowery, was not intentionally used to mislead the audience.
and if 'your audience' was a high-level british academic, you'd get a 2:2 for it, at best.
flowery bullshit doesn't carry weight after high school. they stopped being impressed then.
flowery bullshit doesn't carry weight after high school. they stopped being impressed then.
libertarian benefit collector - anti-academic super-intellectual. http://mixlr.com/the-little-phrase/
you could've done that in a much, much, much shorter length, and made your point better. i mean it wasn't exactly groundbreaking stuff...nukchebi0 wrote:
The sitting on the fence is part of my analysis of the debate over nuclear abolition. It's not intended to be sitting on the fence per se, but rather an attempt to describe the nature of the debate. I'm not exclusively forming an argument in the debate, as that wasn't the intended purpose of the paper. The vocabulary was duly noted, though it wasn't intentionally done.Uzique wrote:
circumlocution
uk english departments don't buy grandiose verbosity in place of actual content and thought. nuk's seems to be an exercise of sitting on the fence and avoiding the manner with pretty words and unnecessary phrasings. get to the point, or at least make one. academically speaking, every paragraph in an essay should make a point- otherwise what's it there for? filler material? at ivy-league level? oh dear.
i prefer the writing of raymond carver to charles dickens. say something to me instead of trying to impress me with a vocabulary i had already back-indexed at age 15.
The paradox is only a conflict between reality and your feeling what reality ought to be.
~ Richard Feynman
~ Richard Feynman
Explicate on the British grading system. And please, provide something of yours judged to be quality.Uzique wrote:
and if 'your audience' was a high-level british academic, you'd get a 2:2 for it, at best.
flowery bullshit doesn't carry weight after high school. they stopped being impressed then.
As noted, it's a rough draft. I'm sure your initial sentences are worthy of the highest praise.
Hmm.Spark wrote:
you could've done that in a much, much, much shorter length, and made your point better. i mean it wasn't exactly groundbreaking stuff...
Too many big words on this page.
nuk, i do my essays in one-draft. dont need to use your flowery bullshit, either. hush up.
here's some 'explicating' for you:
1:1 - A* / A
2:1 - B
2:2 - C
3:1 - D / E
something along those lines. im basically saying that, from the sample, it doesn't seem all that impressive. granted it's a small sample and is a 'draft', whatever. but it hardly shouts "im at one of the world's top universities". this entire thread is just descending into pure boredom, really.
here's some 'explicating' for you:
1:1 - A* / A
2:1 - B
2:2 - C
3:1 - D / E
something along those lines. im basically saying that, from the sample, it doesn't seem all that impressive. granted it's a small sample and is a 'draft', whatever. but it hardly shouts "im at one of the world's top universities". this entire thread is just descending into pure boredom, really.
libertarian benefit collector - anti-academic super-intellectual. http://mixlr.com/the-little-phrase/
You don't edit...no good writer doesn't edit. As I've noted, offer a sample of your own work.Uzique wrote:
nuk, i do my essays in one-draft. dont need to use your flowery bullshit, either. hush up.
Thank you.here's some 'explicating' for you:
1:1 - A* / A
2:1 - B
2:2 - C
3:1 - D / E
The first draft part is important, and remember it was written at 5:30 in the morning. I wasn't offering it as proof of my best writing, as you well know. I'm not sure why you are decrying its lack of quality when I'm not pretending it's anything resembling my best effort. I guess if you enjoy that, then go ahead. I mostly agree with what you are saying, except for the implication that I think it'll pass for good writing here.something along those lines. im basically saying that, from the sample, it doesn't seem all that impressive. granted it's a small sample and is a 'draft', whatever. but it hardly shouts "im at one of the world's top universities". this entire thread is just descending into pure boredom, really.
i dont edit or draft any of my essays for university. my writing, yes. my essays, no.
libertarian benefit collector - anti-academic super-intellectual. http://mixlr.com/the-little-phrase/
How is your 'writing' differentiated from your 'essays'?
creative writing. personal writing. dipshit.
university essays are what i have to do to get a degree. writing i do voluntarily is part of a creative or otherwise productive pursuit.
university essays are what i have to do to get a degree. writing i do voluntarily is part of a creative or otherwise productive pursuit.
libertarian benefit collector - anti-academic super-intellectual. http://mixlr.com/the-little-phrase/
Didn't want to assume that, though it's what I presumed. Also, longer works are called papers, not essays; I thought you might do your shorter university work in one draft, while longer term papers and your personal work received revisions.Uzique wrote:
creative writing. personal writing. dipshit.
university essays are what i have to do to get a degree. writing i do voluntarily is part of a creative or otherwise productive pursuit.