lowing wrote:
I think all of this internet fantasy socializing is destructive for teenagers, for a coupla reasons
1. No one wants to be who they really are, so on line they do not have to be. This leads to problems when the REAL you is interacting in REAL life, a teenager has no experience at it. Because they rarley need to be themselves.
teenagers are rarely themselves, MySpace or not. Most wear masks in "RL", too, and I know of no teenager in High School who hasn't tried to create false impressions of himself for others, for reputation, or other reasons that go together with the horror that is High School.
That's not unusual, and as long as people know you in real life, it ain't much of a problem either.
As long as kids don't get immersed too much in online culture, and have a life outside of the internet, they'll be fine. Escaping from reality is something kids have always done.
lowing wrote:
2. It is a fantasy, nothing on the internet is real, it is an illusion. Something impressionable teenagers do not need when going through REAL life adolescence. It is hard enough in real life without adding the confusion of your fantasy world into the mix.
well, I am real. And I am pretty sure you are, too. Of course, there is a possibility you are really an elaborate microsoft bot, designed to entertain me, but somehow I doubt that.
As I said, lowing, real people in front of those computers, with real feelings. Certainly, they might be lieing about who they really are, or what they do, what job they have, what car they drive, etc., but that can happen when people meet in person, too.
You'll simply have to be careful what you believe and who you trust, regardless of the communication medium. Just because you meet someone in person doesn't mean everything he/she says will be true, just like not everyone you speak to over the internet is automatically lieing.
And you'll be surprised to know that I have actually met people I had first met on the internet in real life, and they turned out to be just like they had said. It's not the medium that's the problem. It's the people.
lowing wrote:
3. Teenagers need to LEARN REAL social interaction. My niece gets home from school and will spend HOURS on MYSPace and shit. Oh sure, she can type like a mother fucker, but real life eludes her.
I agree. Teenagers need to learn social interaction. But social interaction isn't like in the 90's any longer. Technologies change, and so do the means of social interaction. It's about using those technologoes properly, about education, about good parenting.
If I may use the example of your niece, I am sure she has many "real" friends in school, and meets with them in real life, too.
If her parents know what they're doing, they'll encourage her to go out and meet her friends, do sports, socialize, etc...
All of that balanced with her online activities.
This debate reminds me strongly about the debate in the 90's about wether children should have access to a TV of their own, and if yes, at what age. A lot of parents were afraid their kids could become socially isolated, and loose grip on reality, when spending too much time in front of their TV.
But the technology isn't really the issue. This is about good parenting, about preparing your child for life in all of its complexity ( including things like the internet, TV, sex, alcohol, etc. ), and about chosing the right time when to introduce these things into your children's lifes.
Because sooner or later they will be confronted with these things, and at point, I'd rather have my kids prepared and be able to handle those things.
lowing wrote:
I can promise you this, my sons will not be on MySpace or anything like it.
When I grew up, I didn't have a TV of my own until I turned 18. Up to that point, it simply didn't interest me, I was more of a book-reader. I watched the news, and a TV series here and there on the family TV, and that was it. My parents encouraged me to read, and socialize.
They taught me responsible use of communication ans entertainment mediums.
Of course, it is more complicated these days, because of the greater number of these devices, but you as a parent are free to decide at what point you'd like to expose your children to these things, and it is in your hands to make sure they grow up able to use them responsibly, and in balance with "real" life.