What does a hooker ask for a guy named John?
Doe.
(doe as in cash, john doe = anonymous)
Doe.
(doe as in cash, john doe = anonymous)
Philosophy, economics, culture, science, art. <3
I don't get it.andros wrote:
What does a hooker ask for a guy named John?
Doe.
(doe as in cash, john doe = anonymous)
that was shit
yep nevermind.
i worded it wrong + it was probably shit either way but i thought it was funny at the time.
it was "what does a hooker ask for from a guy named john?"
the answer is doe (money).
and john doe = anoynmous character/i think hookers call guys that.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Doe
either way apparently it's not funny to anyone...
i worded it wrong + it was probably shit either way but i thought it was funny at the time.
it was "what does a hooker ask for from a guy named john?"
the answer is doe (money).
and john doe = anoynmous character/i think hookers call guys that.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Doe
either way apparently it's not funny to anyone...
Philosophy, economics, culture, science, art. <3
D'ohandros wrote:
either way apparently it's not funny to anyone...
A wife decides to take her husband to a strip club for his birthday.
They arrive at the club and the doorman says, “Hey, Dave! How ya doin’?” His wife is puzzled and asks if he’s been to this club before. “Oh, no,” says Dave. “He’s on my bowling team.”
When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he’d like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, “How did she know that you drink Budweiser?” “She’s in the Ladies’ Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them.”
A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, and says “Hi Davey. Want your usual lap dance, big boy?” Dave’s wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it. She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every name in the book. The cabby turns his head and says, “Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave.”
They arrive at the club and the doorman says, “Hey, Dave! How ya doin’?” His wife is puzzled and asks if he’s been to this club before. “Oh, no,” says Dave. “He’s on my bowling team.”
When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he’d like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, “How did she know that you drink Budweiser?” “She’s in the Ladies’ Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them.”
A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, and says “Hi Davey. Want your usual lap dance, big boy?” Dave’s wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it. She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every name in the book. The cabby turns his head and says, “Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave.”
hahahahaha
Don't take your wife to a strip club silly!
Don't take your wife to a strip club silly!
Because the slang for money is "dough"andros wrote:
yep nevermind.
i worded it wrong + it was probably shit either way but i thought it was funny at the time.
it was "what does a hooker ask for from a guy named john?"
the answer is doe (money).
and john doe = anoynmous character/i think hookers call guys that.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Doe
either way apparently it's not funny to anyone...
No doubt this is very old
So, I'm stuck in a traffic jam...and nothing is moving. Suddenly, a man knocks on my car and I'm rolling down the window to ask, "what's going on?" He said, "terrorists have kidnapped congress, and they're asking for a $10 million ransom; otherwise, they're gonna douse them all with gasoline and set them on fire. We are going from car to car, taking up a collection." I asked, "how much is everyone giving, on average?" The man replies, "about a gallon."
Last edited by Dilbert_X (2011-12-09 20:12:41)
Русский военный корабль, иди на хуй!
Creative, but long-winded.
"I can't read 3 sentences"unnamednewbie13 wrote:
Creative, but long-winded.
Passengers on a plane are waiting for the flight to leave. The entrance opens, and two men walk up the aisle, dressed in pilot uniforms. Both are wearing dark glasses. One is using a seeing-eye dog, and the other is tapping his way up the aisle with a cane.
Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin, but the men enter the cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start.
The passengers begin glancing nervously, searching for some sign that this is just a little practical joke. None is forthcoming. The plane moves faster and faster down the runway, and people at the windows realize that they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport.
As it begins to look as though the plane will never take off, that it will plow into the water, screams of panic fill the cabin. But at that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air.
Up in the cockpit, the co-pilot turns to the pilot and says, "You know, Bob, one of these days, they're going to scream too late, and we're all gonna die."
Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin, but the men enter the cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start.
The passengers begin glancing nervously, searching for some sign that this is just a little practical joke. None is forthcoming. The plane moves faster and faster down the runway, and people at the windows realize that they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport.
As it begins to look as though the plane will never take off, that it will plow into the water, screams of panic fill the cabin. But at that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air.
Up in the cockpit, the co-pilot turns to the pilot and says, "You know, Bob, one of these days, they're going to scream too late, and we're all gonna die."
for a fatty you're a serious intellectual lightweight.
Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub.
The first one says, "Pass the soap."
The second one says, "No soap, radio!"
The first one says, "Pass the soap."
The second one says, "No soap, radio!"
DungedditAussieReaper wrote:
Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub.
The first one says, "Pass the soap."
The second one says, "No soap, radio!"
for a fatty you're a serious intellectual lightweight.
Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub.
The first one says, "Pass the soap."
The second one says. "What do I look like, a toaster?
The first one says, "Pass the soap."
The second one says. "What do I look like, a toaster?
lol that joke is older than time itself
It's one you tell and laugh at and see which other idiots laugh, the joke is seeing who's an idiot basically
It's one you tell and laugh at and see which other idiots laugh, the joke is seeing who's an idiot basically
And above your tomb, the stars will belong to us.
Camm wrote:
Dungeddit
AussieReaper wrote:
Camm wrote:
Dungeddit
I was on a plane to Switzerland with my wife.Halfway through the flight, a man jumped out of his seat and pulled out a gun."This is a hijack!" he screamed. "If anyone makes a move, I'll kill 'em!"My wife held my hand for comfort. I looked into her eyes, smiled, and then pushed her into the aisle.The hijacker shot her in the head, before being wrestled to the ground by a couple of passengers.Everyone on the plane looked at me in disbelief at what I had just done.I said, "Before you ask, we were on our way to the Dignitas clinic for an assisted suicide, so I did us all a favour."After a few moments silence, an air hostess said, "Well... I suppose her suffering is over now. Was she in a lot of pain?""No, she was fine," I replied. "I'm the one who's dying. I just wanted one last laugh before I go."
for a fatty you're a serious intellectual lightweight.
Women, eh? Give them an inch and they fake a smile.
for a fatty you're a serious intellectual lightweight.
one for you cammpoo
I phoned my work this morning and said, "Sorry boss, I can't come in today, I have a wee cough."
He said, "You have a wee cough?"
I said, "Really? Cheers boss, see you next week!"
I phoned my work this morning and said, "Sorry boss, I can't come in today, I have a wee cough."
He said, "You have a wee cough?"
I said, "Really? Cheers boss, see you next week!"
♥
cool thread